A Jagged Line
by iknowyou2
Summary: They say there's a thin line between love and hate. The line between Will and Lizzie is electrified, jagged, barb-wired, and has poison ivy growing around it. You see once upon a time Elizabeth Bennet and William Darcy secretly loved each other. But not now. Maybe waking up married in Vegas, and meddling friends & family can help with that. M for language and future lemons.
1. A Jagged Line

Well this is my first fanfic. If I get a few reviews I'll keep going.

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. I just like play in Ms. Austen's world.**

**Chapter 1 Tequila or Vodka**

The dream was intense. So many positions, the moaning, the sweaty pulsating bodies. Wait that pulsating was coming from her cranium. "_Dear God, how much did I drink last night?"_

She felt so tired, sick, and heavy. No, that is unfortunately a strange man's arm draped over her waist. "_Fuck, fuck, fuckity, fuck!"_

It also appeared that the mystery man had a HUGE case of morning wood that was conveniently pressed against her ass. "_Isn't this just shittacular?"_

Lizzie's brain had yet to truly wake from its alcohol-induced coma. She suspected it may be due to tequila. "_Or maybe vodka?"_

She made a vain attempt at focusing on the alarm clock, then she realized she wasn't in her room. "_Fuck, shit, crap, fuck! Wait, no more fucking. Fucking bad. Focusing good. First, let's get outta here. Shit! Where the HELL am I?!" _Lizzie tried to wake her suffering mind but only came up with the basics. "_Big Medical_ _Convention. Vegas. Hotel." _ She looked down at the mystery man's arm only to have her heart lurch and her brain almost vibrate with pain.

"_Married?! I fucking fucked a fucking married fucking man! FUCK!"_ Her brain did not know how to compute that shit.

She moved her hand to try to remove the mystery man's offending appendage, when an excruciating brightness hit her retina. There sitting on her left ring finger is a big fat diamond ring. "_Holy hot fucking shit! No! No! Fuck no! Oh dear Lord, no! FUCK! Shit, no! Goddamnit! Please no. Fuck!"_

As her brain, or at least the one small part of it that functioned at the moment, cursed and swore an internal monologue that would make her father proud; her mouth let out an ear piercing scream.

"AAAHHH! Fucking HELL!" apparently the swear words made it from the mind to the mouth after all.

It was at that moment the mystery man bolted upright cradling his head and moaned in deep pain.

"Ugh! What the hell?"

"Darcy?!"

"Bennet?!"

"You're naked…"

"You're nude…"

"You have a hard-on!"

"Shit!"

"Your hand…"

"Excuse me?"

"Your fucking hand!"

"What? You wanna see a show!?"

"Your left hand!"

"I'm more of a righty-"

"Look at your fucking left hand you damn freak!"

"Holy shit! Is that a-"

"Yup."

"Did we…?"

"Yup."

"Fuuuuuck!"

"Apparently we did that too."

Darcy stared at his hand for what Lizzie felt was an eternity. It seemed that his mind simply shut down. She could understand that. She herself was having a mental meltdown. William Motherfucking Darcy is wearing a matching platinum wedding band.

"_That bastard got me drunk!"_

"_That bitch got me drunk!"_

**A/N **Well that was chapter one. Hope you liked it. Yes it was short. Some chapters will be longer. Please let me know what you think.


	2. Oooh That Explains It

So I couldn't help myself. I had to submit chapter two to make up for the shortness of the first chapter.

**Disclaimer: I still don't own it.**

**Chapter 2: OOOh That Explains It**

They say there's a thin line between love and hate. The line between Will and Lizzie is electrified, jagged, barb-wired, and has poison ivy growing around it. You see once upon a time Elizabeth Bennet loved William Darcy. From afar. Only her best friend, Charlotte, and favorite sisters, Jane and Mary, knew about it.

They all went to the same college but hung out in totally different circles. She and Darcy did have a few classes together but he never acknowledged her existence. She started a semester behind him because she graduated at 16 and worked her ass off for her scholarship.

Most people saw him as emo and distant. She saw him as pensive and deep. It was during her obsessive almost stalker-like phase that she noticed that he was not antisocial, but painfully shy. She saw him subtly wipe his sweaty palms on his pants before and after he would clench them in tight fists whenever giving speeches to the class or talking to professors. He was not haughty and aloof. He simply wanted to fade into the crowd or even the wall.

Perhaps he would have been successful if he had not been 6ft 5in, with rich dark hair, and strange deep midnight eyes. They looked almost black unless they caught the light just right. But what really got her was his mind. The man was smexy! (So smart it's sexy) It was her kryptonite.

She was so in love with him, it hurt. So when he had belittled her to their professor and demanded a different partner for a project, she all but cracked. She got assigned a new partner and got the highest grade. She made it her plan to intellectually kick his smexy ass at every possible turn. She even took extra classes to be in the same semester. He noticed her then. She was the Academia Queen of the campus. She would catch him staring at her with intense contempt. She would do her best to laugh and live a social and happy life all while maintaining a higher GPA. Her work had eventually moved her up yet another semester.

Her sister Mary started school, a year after her. All three sisters lived together and helped each other get through the awkwardness of being 'too young', 'too smart for their own good', or her favorite 'The Bennet Freaks'. She turned 18 and everything went from awkward to totally fucked. She still can't think of the 'Night Not to be Mentioned' without wanting to physically harm Darcy.

Being a senior while he was a junior helped her avoid him. However every now and then she would catch him glaring at her from across the quad or library. The bitch of it all was that he just got even more attractive as he got older. Oh and the glasses he wore. Still smexy. Still an asshole.

"_And then I went and married the fucker."_

As Lizzie contemplated the past, Will was having his own flashback and inner dialogue.

"_How could I let this happen? I promised myself I was over her. Damn vodka. Or was it tequila? Why her? Why the fuck did it have to be Elizabitch Fucking Bennet!"_

He had met her in college. But before that, he was already aware of one Bennet, Jane. His best friend, Charles Bingley, saw her the day they had toured the campus. He and Charles were registered to start in the fall and went to an early orientation. Jane was the tour guide. He thought she was pretty in a magazine kinda way. He thought she'd be perfect for toothpaste ads. Charles was in love at first glance. It was a new kind of pain; embarrassment by association. His friend practically left a trail of drool as they walked. At the end of the tour there was a lunch held for mingling. Charles, in a sad imitation of a lost puppy, followed Miss. Bennet everywhere asking question after question.

Will, being the social caterpillar that he is, simple sat there nodding or 'Mmhmming' whenever necessary. Jane, ever the shy but devoted sister, told them of her Lizzie. That for her 16th birthday she would graduate from high school and then join them for the spring semester.

Avoiding talking about herself, while singing the praises of her favorite sisters, was one of Jane's favorite hobbies. Will learned a lot about Elizabeth Bennet. He hadn't even noticed how enthralled he was with this unknown entity until he found himself asking questions about her. Luckily only his friend knew that this rare human interaction was such an odd occurrence for him.

When the spring semester started, he found himself looking for her while calling himself a sick pedo-freak. When he found her in a class with him he nearly passed out because he forgot to breath. No seriously, he was dizzy and lightheaded for 30 minutes after. She was everything he imagine and more. He wanted to die.

Two years. Two God-damn fucking years before he could even ask her out. Add to the fact that he was the social equivalent of road kill, and he knew that he was thoroughly fucked. The only ones who knew of his perversity were his best friend and his cousin Fredrick Fitzwilliam. At first they teased him; that is until he asked them to help with his OCD and shyness. That had them floored and eager to help. They knew he was in love if he wanted to be a better man for her. Two years. Two years to 'fix' his problem so he could get the girl. Two years.

Too bad he had to fuck it up. He knew he couldn't work with her. He'd end up either in jail because he wouldn't be able to control himself or locked up in a padded room because he'd lose his mind. No matter what the outcome, she'd think of him as a freak and/or a perve. Why did she have to hear him!?

Then she started to act like a bitch. Yet, he loved her even more. She had her reasons and he understood. But every time he tried to make amends in some small way she'd become cold. His friend and cousin told him to move on. He couldn't let her go. Her eyes enchanted him and her mind enthralled him.

She turned 18 on the night of her sister's December graduation. Jane, Lizzie, and the other Bennet on campus, Mary, all mingled at a university party for those on the dean's list. Charles and Darcy were finally going to approach them. Two years he had been working up to this. One dance. That's all he was gonna ask for. He'd confess why he said what he said to get out of working with her. He'd beg for forgiveness and a date.

His stomach rolled with anxiety. Or was it dinner? She was with Jane talking to a couple of professors by the punch. As he opened his mouth to speak, Charles swiftly came from behind him and playfully smacked him between his shoulders. The contents of his stomach were not much, but enough to get the women's shoes. As Darcy made a splash, Bing jumped back and crashed into a waiter who was about to refill the punch bowl. There was not a lot of punch spilled, but it was enough to stain Jane and Lizzie's pale pink and white dresses. Smooth. Before Will could get over the shock, Charles lunged across the girls for a stack of napkins only to slip on a concoction of regurgitation and fruit punch. Apparently he was determined not to go down alone. With one arm he grabbed Darce, with the other Lizzie, who in turn grabbed her sister, who held on to, of all things, the tablecloth behind her. All parties went down in a crash of limbs and glass. Charles hit his head and passed out. Elizabeth had a shard of glass sticking out of her leg a few inches above her ankle and a young Will Darcy face down in her lap. Yup, face down…there. Jane called out for Mary as the professors helped Will and Lizzie get up. Before he could gather his senses he saw Jane and Mary helping Lizzie out the door.

If she was a bitch to him before, she was bitchzilla after that.

He only saw her around campus after that. He overheard her and her friend talk about 'That Night' in the library. Her remarks were… colorful. When Charlotte insinuated that he may indeed like her and that she should try to give him the benefit of the doubt, she went off. Apparently Darcy is the last man in the world she would ever have feelings for.

A heartbroken William Darcy grew angry. She had never once held a real conversation with him. She had never once let him get close enough to even try to apologize. She was a cold ice-bitch who cared more about her grades than the feelings of others.

"_And now I'm married to the bitch."_

Lizzie was snapped back to reality by the protests of her stomach. She jumped out of the bed and did the drunken shuffle to the bathroom. "Come on _Hubby_, time to do your husbandly duty and hold my hair back while I curse at you for ruining my life between heaves."

"Not a morning person _Wifey_?" Will threw out while watching her naked form retreat to the bathroom. He may be hung-over but he was still a male. He reached down to find his boxers and stood up to pull them up, only to be forced to sit back down from the dizziness.

"Damn it Darce! Get your ass in here! I'm not kidding! You damn ass-…" Her rant was cut off by an ungodly retching sound.

"_Well that takes care of the erection issue."_ "Yes dear. Coming Dear." Darcy made his way to the bathroom while making a choking motion with his hands around an imaginary Lizzie's neck.

He sat down next to her because bending over displaced the blood to his head in nauseating way. He held her hair and rubbed her back as she paid homage to the porcelain gods. True they hated each other but they learned to be civil over the last few years. After all they did work together.

**A/N** Okay so I hope that makes up for the short Chapter One. Please R&R. Thanks in advance.


	3. How Did We Get Here?

Thank you to everyone who has read the first chapters and thought well enough of them to read thus far. I really am thankful. So far I have 7 chapters done. I am just in the process of refining them. I don't know yet how many chapters this story will have yet. I know where I want to go with this, but I am always open to suggestions and courteous critiques. This chapter is another flashback. Once all the backstory is finished there will be fewer.

Disclaimer: It's Austen's world, I'm just screwing with her characters.

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**Chapter 3: How Did We Get Here?**

She had been simply ecstatic. Jane had been working at Pemberly Medical for a year, and had recommended Lizzie and Mary for surgical positions. All the Bennets knew Jane was highly above intelligent, Lizzie was a genius, and Mary was a super-brain. So it was not surprising that Mary would catch up to Elizabeth academically. Their father was proud of their achievements.

Mrs. Bennet, not so much, "How on Earth can you go through college and NOT get a husband?!"

Mr. Bennet had high hopes for the next generations. Unfortunate for him, his hopes were extinguished when Kitty learned to read fluently at the age of five, instead of four like her predecessors. Worse was Lydia who learned at six, which much to his dismay, was abhorrently average. Neither had skipped ahead a single school level. Kitty did slightly better than Lydia by graduating with honors in the top 5% of her class. Lydia had only made the top 10%. Oh the shame.

Mrs. Bennet also had high hopes for the younger daughters. "At least they aren't too smart. Men don't appreciate women showing them up in school!" Yeah, she really did say that. Let's not go there right now.

Back to the sweet, witty, and brainy Bennet sisters. After Jane finished her residency she was recruited by a Pemberly head-hunter. Jane, humble of her skills as ever, never even sent her resume to such a prestigious institution. Although it was a surprise, the enigma was soon forgotten as they joyously packed Jane up to transfer back home to Texas. Her first year was both exhilarating and frustrating. She was fighting the prejudices of senior staff members; making pursuing her specialty difficult. Jane, being an optimist, was understanding and forgiving. She desperately wanted her sisters with her and begged them to apply. Little did she know it was hardly necessary; they had been recruited as well.

Lizzie was not above paying her dues, but her and her sisters' first year was fucking ridiculous. Most people become surgeons in their late twenties - early thirties. The Bennet girls were in their _early _twenties, highly attractive, and apparently hated by their directors.

They were confined to the E.R. for 85% of the time. They seemed to be the director's last resort for procedures. Jane was a gifted cardiologist. Lizzie was a skilled orthopedic surgeon. Mary, of course, was a neurologist. That's right, a brain surgeon. Lizzie was growing tired of setting casts for Ritalin infused juveniles. During her fellowship Lizzie was on the surgical team that reattached a foot. A fucking foot! What the hell were they doing in the E. fucking R. all the time? She wasn't against being there, but crap there has to be a limit.

Maybe she would have been able to hang back and stay calm, but there was another reason she was pissed. She made friends with some of the nurses and still enjoyed her job. However, not all of the male population _hated _the Bennet siblings. There were innuendos, 'accidental' slips of the hand, and outright propositions. She made formal written complaints to Chief Young. He ignored them all, claiming that they were paying their dues, blowing everything out of proportion, and that it would all lead to them developing a thicker skin.

Ass. Hole.

Threaten. Law. Suit.

That was the end of the year of hell.

Dr. Young was demoted. Dr. Gardiner took his place. And Dr. Fitzwilliam, a vascular surgeon, joined the team. Lizzie and her sisters were finally allowed to practice their craft. They quickly gained the staff's respect and admiration. The sisters were known for their quick thinking, steady hands, and grace under pressure. Yet they were also known for their highly esteemed racks and asses. Just saying.

They still did some time down in the E.R. every now and then. It was there that she found out who her real boss was.

It was a hectic day and Liz and Mary were called in to help out an over-loaded emergency room. Lizzie was barely catching her breath when an ambulance brought in a bruised and bloody unconscious young girl. She saw in her peripheral vision the tall man that came in with her but zoned in on the girl and what she needed. The EMT's shouted out her vitals and known injuries as they wheeled the gurney to the nearest curtained off room. Once the young girl was stabilized, she sent an intern to get as much information as possible from the man who brought her. Liz had several other patients she had to check on and would talk to him after.

He wasn't in the waiting room so she took the short free moment to visit the staff break room in an attempt to choke down the caffeinated burnt sludge they called coffee. Then what do her bloodshot eyes see? Fucking Darcy! It had been years. Years since she had seen him. She was about start a fierce inquisition when Dr. Fitzwilliam comes in behind her.

"Will! How is she? What happened? Where is she?"

"_Well that's unexpected."_ She thought.

Darcy who had been on the edge of his seat and hunched over had just barely noticed Lizzie. He instantly shot up and pleaded with his eyes as reality dawned on her. The girl.

"Please Dr. Bennet. My sister? Tell me she's alright." He pleaded.

Lizzie quickly drew on a professional face and relayed her injuries and stable condition. She asked him basic questions about her medical history and then the specifics on how she obtained her injuries. He told her that she was assaulted and asked that a rape kit be administered. She had never seen a man look so distraught. She let him know that she'd let the appropriate staff know since she was only an ortho and just on-call that evening and would be going home soon.

"No."

"_What the hell?"_ She thought. The question must have been plainly written on her face.

"This is a sensitive family matter and I don't want the entire staff to know. In fact I will have you, and any other employees that have helped, sign a confidentiality agreement before anyone leaves. Fredrick please contact Bingley to have the papers drawn up immediately. The faster and fewer involved the better."

Lizzie was furious. "How dare you assume that I would be anything but professional?! And who the hell do you think you are to order me around like that?" He had gone from human to robot so fast she felt the symptoms of whiplash. She had a glimpse of his vulnerability and had hurt for his suffering. Then he had to go from 0 to asshole in a heartbeat.

He was about to respond to her when Freddie got him to take a breather and go rest in his office. He'd take care of everything and send for him when his sister woke up. After he reluctantly left, Fred turned to Elizabeth and half joking half seriously said, "I don't think talking to the owner of this establishment in that particular way is healthy for your career."

"_Holy hot fucking hell."_

After she complied with his wishes and helped with Georgiana, of whom she became friends with, she seemed to see him everywhere. She also decided to research him. She _Binged_ him. She just wasn't into _Googling_ people. Charlotte called it a phase, even a fetish. Don't knock it till you try it.

Turns out he's Texas' most eligible bachelor. Rated as one of the top philanthropists as well. But that was just in their home state. He made a name for himself on a national level as well. How could she not know this? He _owns_ Pemberly Medical. He also owns a lot of real-estate, clinics, pharmacy labs, and even a ranch. Okay it's Texas so owning a ranch is not a big deal. But crap! He's. Her. BOSS!

"Oh dear God I married my BOSS!" She shouted as she then continued to offer up the contents of her stomach. "Say _something_ you prick!"

"Stop yelling at your _boss_ slash _husband_ you bitch. It was probably your idea anyway." He couldn't bring himself to raise his voice to her. Mostly because high decibels caused him severe pain at the moment.

"Me? What the fuck? Wait you don't remember?"

"Not one fucking moment. Then again I still don't think my brain is functioning at 100% yet. You?"

"Brain-dead. I got nothing. I'm gonna take a shower. Yet somehow I don't think soap will wash away your vileness or the shame. The dirty, filthy, shame." She shuddered as she made her unsteady way to the shower, praying simultaneously not to fall and that the steamy water could wake her up and jostle her memory.

William felt his stomach drop when reality hit him. "_I'm married. MARRIED!" _And there goes dinner. What exactly did he eat and drink last night? That looked almost alien. Sick! "_What do I do now? Damage control. Call Charles." _Throw up. "_Find Fredrick." _Hurl some more. "_Talk to Elizabeth."_ Cough and gag. She broke him from his daze when she asked for a towel.

"Leave the shower on. I have my own shame to scrub off." He said as he handed her the towel.

If only the heat of the water could wash away this sin. He tried to clear his head and remember. All that ran through his mind were more questions. Liz and her sisters were all highly skilled and sought after surgeons. Could this predicament jeopardize their position? Would she leave and take two of his most valued employees with her? Was he over her? Had he kidded himself in thinking he only recruited her and her sisters because he knew it would pay off in the long run?

But she was just such a _bitch_. A frosty bitch at that. After the incident with his sister, he had tried numerous times to approach her. He wanted to thank her for her service, discretion, and friendship towards his equally shy sister. He could only watch her as she threw daggers through her eyes and walked away. When the Bennet sisters had notoriety for their skills, they were invited to many of the same social events that he had to attend. He loathed the obligation and often tried to fade away into the background. Her presence did not help his sweaty palms, rapid heart rate, or stutter. He often had to resort to mono-syllable replies to questions or just avoid people. Humans tend to converse. They must therefore be avoided.

He didn't know who was more pathetic. Him or his friends. His cousin has been in awe of Mary Bennet since she first walked into his O.R. Charles still has yet to ask out his _Dear Jane_. At least he had real issues that prevented him from making a move. What were their excuses? Instead of trying to actually date them, they would drag him out to all the events they knew they were to attend. Seriously, what the fuck? Okay so maybe they couldn't go unless he got them invites; but did _he_ really need to go? It pained him to see them try so hard and get nowhere. They never got the nerve to ask them to dance and had to watch as other men danced and flirted with their Bennets.

"_If anything good comes outta this maybe they could have conversations with them that lasted more than five minutes about something outside of work."_ He mused. "_Wait. Oh shit!" _He was now in the position to help them get the women they've been after. Deep down Will was a romantic. He was also extremely loyal and wanted the people he cared about to be happy. Even if he ends up divorced he'd be able to help the guys out. "_Wait _if_? No, _when _I get a divorce."_

When he walked into the bedroom to dress he found Elizabeth savagely tearing through everything. He knew he needed to get dressed and get out. Now. With the quickness.

**A/N:** I just want to publicly thank and acknowledge a few readers:

janefanatic: Sorry about the near mishap with the coffee. I'll try to tone it down...nah. You've reviewed twice already! Wow! For so much support please name an evil, jealous, and Caroline-ish MALE.

ConstanceBoniful: Yes I will try to stay on top of this story and update asap, just for you. BTW I think I erased your review by accident. Therefore please name a new nurse. She must be evil, so let me know.

cutelilmochi: I hope this chapter answered the age question. The Bennets STARTED at PemMed in their early 20's and are now mid-late 20's. You were the first to review so please name a new doctor male or female.

mgfostee : You were the first to follow this story. Thank you give me a new name for Mrs. Reynolds' son.

Not all these characters wil be written in immediately. Look for them in later chapters. Thanks again for reading! Sending mad love!


	4. Okay, Wait What?

Okay so don't hate me...but this is a short one. I know, I know. But If you kill me, how will I write?

Disclaimer: BLah blAH. Not mine.

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**Chapter 4: Okay, Wait... What?**

She was sore. There was no questioning whether or not they had sex. She would also get little flashes of what happened. She needed coffee and her sisters. Desperately. Now. She got dressed for the last day of the convention; when something vital suddenly occurred to her.

"_Oh shit, oh shit, oh fucking shit!"_ She searched everywhere and found nothing. She did find the marriage certificate and a DVD of the wedding. She also saw that the ever proper Mr. Darcy neatly folded his clothes before their little sex-a-thon last night. "_Typical control freak."_ She saw good ole Darce make his way out the bathroom and towards his pristine apparel. She made a dash in the bathroom to see if maybe it was in the trash in there.

She wanted to weep.

When she made her way back he already had his pants and socks on. His black shirt was on but still unbuttoned, leaving a perfect set of six-pack abs on display. "_Stop looking. Stop looking!"_ It seemed he was in a hurry to leave as he sat on the bed to put on his shoes. "_The BED!"_

"GET UP!"

"What?" He dropped a shoe. Huh, funny the other shoe just dropped.

"I said get the fuck off the bed!" She screamed as looked under the covers.

"Do you mind telling me what the hell is the matter with you?! What the fuck are you looking for? Your sanity perhaps? If so, let me know if you find mine as well 'cause marrying you was some kind of crazy shit."

"Condoms!" She almost cried.

"Well in that case," he started to remove his shirt. "We could try it without the alcoholic influence."

"No you idiot! Put that back on!" He had the nerve to chuckle. Fucking chuckle. "I'm not on birth control you fucktard! Do you see any condom wrappers? Any evidence that we used protection? Well do you?!"

"Fuck!" He ran a frustrated hand through his hair.

"Yup."

Darcy sat back down on the bed in shock. "How could you not be on something?"

"What?! Oh no you don't Darcy! You are not putting this on my ass. I have no _reason_ to be on birth control. I've never even been on a third date. I practically _live_ at the hospital!" She wanted to slap the shit outta him. How dare he insinuate that she needed to be on birth control? "Asshole. What about you? Why the hell didn't _you_ use _something_? Don't you always carry some on you or have some in your wallet?"

Oh he was pissed. What kind of man did she think he was! "First of all, as a doctor you know that wallets can damage condoms. So no, I do not carry them on me. Second, I'm not the kind of man who sleeps around or engages in casual sex." She chuckled in a sarcastic 'yeah right' sort of way. Fucking chuckled! "When would I have had the time or ability, Miss Bennet?!" He exploded as he started to pace. "In high school when I was a socially stunted, stuttering, OCD head-case in an all-boys school!? In college when I couldn't work with or speak to a girl without sweating through my clothes!? Or maybe in law school in between panic attacks!? Oh or how about after my father died and left me with a teenage sister to raise, a hospital to run, and half a dozen other ventures to secure?!"

He was so far into his rant he hadn't realized that he had just told Liz that he had been a virgin. "So go ahead Bennet. Look for the elusive contraceptive!" He said as he threw the sheets back. Her face was in a state of near shock and confusion. "It's both of our faults and we will have to deal with this as fucking adults! I'm outta here!"

He bent down to retrieve his other shoe when he saw the evidence of her lost virginity on the sheets. He instantly felt his heart sink. She lost something she would never get back to a man she hates. She even admitted that she couldn't remember it. He looked up and saw he eyes water.

"I don't have to go to anything at the convention today. I'll be in my room all day if you should need me." He sighed gently. "If you don't want to go to that last seminar today you don't have to." He just wanted to make her pain stop.

Lizzie saw it again. That human part of him. She never knew he had such a hard time. She got misty eyed and her throat constricted just thinking of how difficult life had been for him. Something in her just wanted to wipe away all of his pain. He lost something last night. He gave it to her and he can't even remember it. She didn't know what to say or do. She needed to talk to her sisters and figure out what happens next. "I had already agreed to meet my sisters for the 'Women's History of Medical Science' lecture, but maybe after I could meet you in your room. Would you mind if I bring them, you know, for moral support?"

"Yes, of course. I understand. Fredrick will more than likely be there as well." He tried to smile but he hung his head down and she didn't see it. He turned away and headed for the door. "Enjoy the lecture Miss Bennet." With that he left and she let the tears fall.

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**A/N** Okay so it was short but it was very...informative. Yup both got their V-card cashed in. I had to end the chapter there, sorry. The flashbacks will be less frequent now. They'll pop up when needed.

LadyElejahDarcy: I promise to not go on hiatus. I plan to follow through to the end. I may take breaks along the way for medical reasons but I won't abandon it.

andreyvit: Thanks for reading and I'm glad you're enjoying it so far.

janefanatic and mgfostee: Thank you so much for the great new names.

Guests: to all the guests who read and reviewed but didn't leave a name. Thank you so much for taking the time to comment.

Thanks to everyone who has Faved and/or Followed my fic. I appreciate it so much.


	5. Breakfast of Champions

Ahh, I see you have made it to chapter five. Thank you for reading thus far. Here you will start to see less flashbacks. You will also see that Elizabeth is still stubborn about how she feels/thinks about Darcy. You will also see more misunderstandings coming soon. The postings are about to slow down now. My daughter was on spring break and with her father and I managed to get a lot of writing done. Now back to school for both of us. I promise at least one chapter every week.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters. But I do wish I owned Darcy.

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**Chapter 5: Breakfast of Champions**

Lizzie tried her best to put herself together. She focused on her hair and make-up. But she couldn't stop thinking about how wrong she had been about him. "_God I'm such a bitch sometimes."_ She hated him, but she hated the fact that she had been so, well, bitchy. The newest revelation that he was not as malicious as she thought he was did not mean he wasn't still an asshole. His assholishness just wasn't as evil as she had perceived.

She wanted to be with her sisters. Jane would find a bright side. Like divorce. And Mary would be able to find a logical solution. Like divorce. She grabbed her purse and stuffed the ring, DVD, and the marriage certificate inside. She'd probably need proof 'cause her sisters would not be able to believe this shit.

Her sisters. What would they have done if this had happened to them? Jane would probably cry for joy if Charlie married her. She's had it bad for him for an eternity. Mary would probably refuse to leave the hotel room until she demonstrated every move she ever read about in the _Karma Sutra _if it was her and Fred. She shared her love for smexy men.

"_Oh shit! I could totally use this marriage as a way to hook them up! Yes! Silver lining."_

But how long would it take? What if he wanted a Brittney Spears type of quickie annulment? Not that she wanted to stay married to him of course. She was totally over him. Has been for years. She only went to all those fancy shindigs for her sisters' sake; and of course the free food. Networking, that's what it was, networking. That and laughing as Darcy squirmed uncomfortably when women flirted with him, not that she spent all night watching him. No her stalking days were done. Some women, though just refuse to give up. _Especially _Charlie's sister, Caroline. Damn that woman was persistent.

"_That bitch is gonna have a fucking aneurysm When she finds out!" _

It was with that thought that her sisters saw her with a shit-eating joker grin on her face. Liz flung herself on her sisters and told them they were skipping the lecture and going for breakfast and some much needed coffee and conversation.

"What the hell do you mean you're not surprised?!" Lizzie gawked. She raised her hand and pointed to exhibit A that she had pulled out and now rested on her left hand.

Jane gently lifted he sister's jaw from its gaping position. "Sweetie you've been in love with that man since you were 16."

"Plus we were the witnesses." Mary stated with an audibly duh-like tone.

"WHAT. THE. FUCK!?" There goes the jaw again. "Why didn't you guys STOP me?! You _know_ I don't like him!"

"Oh we know you don't like him. However, as Jane mentioned, you do love him. So why should we have stopped you from marrying the man you love?"

"But I _hate_ him!"

"Lizzie!" Jane chastised her. "Hate is such a strong word. You shouldn't talk about your husband like that." She had the nerve to grin. Fucking grin at her!

"Did you notice Jane, that she did not deny loving him just now?" Mary asked.

"Yes, Mary I did. Fascinating isn't it?"

"An obvious sign from her subconscious. Don't you think?"

"The heart wants, what the heart wants."

"Oh funny. I get it; head doc and heart doc wanna make jokes. How 'bout the muscle and bone doc starts to kick your asses?"

"That would only be funny if you were a proctologist." Mary quipped.

"I hate you both so much right now."

"Oh Lizzie, it'll all be okay. You'll see." Jane soothed as she rubbed her back gently.

Mary intruded on the quiet moment. "How was the sex? Was the equipment adequate?"

"Mary!" Jane chided. "If Lizzie wants to tell us, she'll do so when she's comfortable." Both sisters then proceeded to give her the sisterly you-can-tell-me-anything look. After a minute of silence, the look morphed into the sisterly tell-me-now-or-you'll-regret-it look.

"Look if I knew I'd tell you. Honestly! I just can't remember." She sighed remembering the humility on Darcy's face. "I know that we did…you know. But all I get are vague flashes in and out."

After Mary snickered and muttered 'in and out', the ever so practical sister, asked the obvious. "You did use protection though, right?" Lizzie pushed her burger and fries away and purposely banged her head on the table. Yes a burger for breakfast. Don't judge. "Holy shit Liz! Seriously?" Another bang.

The girls grew quiet and contemplated. Lizzie retrieved her burger. Well her stomach _was_ empty after all. Plus she is sometimes an emotional eater.

She awoke from her food induced stupor by the sound of Mary slurping the last of her double chocolate chip milkshake. It was in the Bennet genes to both love chocolate to the point of near addiction, and to eat what they wanted, whenever the hell the mood fit. Jane was eating fajitas with salsa and chips.

"So, um, I was thinking…" She started.

"So _now_ you decide to pick up the habit?" Mary giggled. Fucking giggled.

"Mary let her speak. Go ahead Lizzie. Dazzle us with your profound morning after hung-over wisdom."

"Thanks? I think. Okay I'm thinking that this…situation…um, my uh…marriage, could help you two get closer to Charlie and Freddie."

"That's so sweet of you Lizzie, but I can't take advantage of…um, the…situation, like that. It just wouldn't be right." Jane looked to Mary for support. She was a bit disappointed.

"I'm in!" Mary gave Jane a questioning look. "What? This is simply making the most out of the _situation_. Don't look at me like that Jane. We don't even _really _know if these men are attracted to us. Being around them more will at least give us some much needed knowledge. If they don't return at least some of our ardor, we will have closure or possibly be able to increase their affection. Or, at the very least we would have a chance to show them what their missing." Mary had one of her evil genius smiles splashed across her face while the other two sisters stared in both awe and fear.

"Ardor, who _talks_ like that?" Lizzie had to break the short yet seemingly loud silence.

Jane's mind finally clicked, "How long can you stay married to him? Don't look at me like that Lizzie. Mary made a good point. So how much time do we have?"

"I don't know. After this we are going to meet Darce and Fred in my _husband's_ room to have a discussion."

"Ooh Freddie? How do I look?" Mary ran a hand over her almost jet black ponytail to smooth it.

"Mary, hun, you have a bit of lasagna on the side of your mouth." Jane handed Mary a napkin. Yes, lasagna for breakfast.

Up in a deluxe business suite a similar conversation took place.

Darcy had Charles on video conference on a large flat screen and Fredrick on a couch facing it while eating a rather large burrito. William paced in the space between.

"What do you mean it's unethical? Charles you have been in love with 'Dearest Jane' for years man, _years_!"

Freddie was beyond excited, "Hey I'm all for it. Besides, what if she really is knocked up? The longer we keep them together, the better they know each other and possibly stay together. Plus we'll have to be around to ensure Slick Willie here doesn't screw up. We could find out if the Bennets feel _anything_ for us. If they don't, this is our best and maybe last opportunity to damn well make 'em!"

Will stopped pacing to stare at his cousin. Charlie started to clean the projectile coffee off his monitor and camera lens.

"Don't judge me! I'd do almost anything aside from homicide to get that woman's attention. Hell, I sometimes _do_ think I might kill that nurse Chad Cooper who always stares at her ass." Freddie fumed.

"The only reason you are even aware of nurse Cooper's leering is because you're doing it too." Charlie chided.

"That's because it's so… just…damn. I've got it bad. She's so freakin' smart, beautiful, and funny. I see the way she acts with her clients. She has a way of explaining everything in a way they understand. She's gentle and caring. Yet, she knows how and when to be more stern with the stubborn patients. Is it wrong that those damn glasses turn me on so much? Fuck she's hot!"

After Charles finished cleaning he took a bite outta his waffle, hash brown, sausage, and cheese sandwich. With a mouth full of handheld breakfast goodness, he asked, "So why haven't you ever asked her out?"

"Intimidation. Pure and simple. She is constantly reading. Sometimes its medical journals, sometimes its history or non-fiction. And sometimes it's even romance. Fuck me! I once read a medical review I saw her reading just to be able to talk to her about it. When I next saw her, she was reading _Fifty__ Shades of Grey_. I went to the bookstore bought it and could only read halfway through before I realized she's completely outta my league. She's just so…so everything. Even her hair is sexy. Mmm ponytail. I'd love to just hold on to it and just…"

"Ooookay! On that note, I believe what my hormonally challenged cousin is trying to say, is that he's no better than you, Charles, at finding the capacity to communicate or even function properly around the girl of his dreams. This could be your last chance."

"Well yes I see your point. But it's not right to leak out that you got married just to manipulate her into staying married to you if she wants a divorce." Bingley sulked. He didn't want to waste this opportunity either, but he hated the thought of winning Jane's heart like that.

"You know what I think Bing? I think Will just wants time with Elizabeth to get her to love him as much as he loves her."

William was in the middle of dismantling his BLT with extra B, when grunted negatively.

"Grunting is not a denial." Charles smirked. Fucking smirked.

"He hasn't even denied loving her. Did you notice?"

"Yes, yes I did."

Will removed the T from his sandwich and added cheese and two fried eggs as he grunted a few more times. Hand held food became a habit to the men, go figure.

"Holly Shit!" Both gentlemen had mouths full of food when they turned towards the flat screen. "We don't have to leak anything. It's already been done! I just got an email from PR. A few gossip rags as well as a few legit newspapers have requested a comment from Will."

"Shnd us hot wee."

Both men looked at Freddie trying to talk with his mouth over flowing with breakfast burrito.

He swallowed and said, "Shit just got real."

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**A/N:** Okay so our little groups have quirks with food. Mary is...well you'll hear more from Mary soon. I have always thought her and Kitty got the short end. In this story Mary really comes to life. It will remain focused on E&D, but she will definately have a huge role. I will have another story posted soon. I plan on having a few more chapters of this one up first. To clarify the age issue; the Bennet sisters **started **at PemMed their early twenties. A few years passed. Jane is 29. Lizzie, 27. And Mary, 26. Most surgeons start their careers around those ages. The Bennets not only finished their education, residencies, and fellowships (specialties); but they are already well established in their careers.


	6. Something About Mary

Hey everyone. Thanks to all of you who have been following. I will try to post once or twice a week. I will try to post at least every Sunday starting now. But this will have to hold you for a while. I didn't get a lot of reviews but the ones I did get were encouraging so THANK YOU so so much. You guys really do help me type faster.

Discaimer: Austen totally rocked this first. I own nothing.

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**Chapter 6: Something About Mary**

With time to spare after breakfast, the sisters decide to attend the second half of the lecture and then have lunch with Darcy and Fredrick in their room after. They had been talking at the restaurant for hours already and thought they should return to civilization.

Sitting in the back, Mary took notes in her iPad, Jane listened seemingly to be polite, and Lizzie scanned her jumbled up memory. Broken pieces of last night ran out of order in her mind. A couple of hours later, Jane began to poke and prod her out of her zombie-like state.

Mary finally got her attention by shoving her iPad at her. There, a picture of Lizzie and Darcy picking out rings at _Bvlgari_. She couldn't even read the headline. Her mind swam with images that swirled too fast to decipher. She felt Jane's hand gently cradle her own while Mary tried to get her to focus.

Once the quasi-anxiety attack was over Mary turned towards Liz and had her focus. Mary tried her best to whisper, "Okay Liz, keep calm. Focus. I'm not sure if you really understand what it means to be discovered like this. Darce is a bit on the famous side. I'm not sure how this is gonna go down. I don't imagine that this will be easy. You need to be strong. Hold your head up, and keep your composure. Liz? Lizzie? Elizabeth, do you understand?" Lizzie could only nod.

Jane noticed an electric charge in the room. The last lecturer was wrapping it up, and everyone started to turn on their phones. It was like a wave of internet blather gone viral before her very eyes. The woman at the podium thanked everyone for coming and mixed with the applause was an audible chorus of gossip.

"He married who?"

"No way."

"Well I heard they've been secretly dating for a while."

"Yeah, like years."

"Oh my God! Did you hear? She's a doctor."

"She's here at the conference I bet."

"It happened here in Vegas!"

Jane knew they needed to get out of there fast. "Lizzie sweetie, we need to go." Jane said as she all but lifted her right outta her seat and threw her and Mary towards the doors. "_Too late. Crap!"_

They were spotted by a few over-dressed, surgically enhanced, reality TV junkie, gossip addicted flakes.

"Oh my God! You're HER!" Exclaimed bleached-out-housewife-wanna-be number one.

"Can I see the ring?" Exclaimed bleached-out-housewife-wanna-be number two.

Lizzie vaguely heard a question about the honeymoon before her sisters rushed her away as various strangers with camera phones snapped pictures.

"How did this happen? He was just Darce. Why on earth is this such a big fucking deal?" Lizzie thought.

"You obviously don't realize who you just married Liz." Lizzie gave her sister the bitch brow as they entered the elevator. "Yes you said it out loud, Liz. Do you not realize he makes the _Forbes_ list **every** year? Or that he is sought out to help other companies to get them through a tough economy? Politicians even ask his advice. Liz." Mary sighed with love and frustration. "He's only 'just Darce' to you. To the world he is Fitzwilliam Richard Darcy, billionaire, philanthropist and world renowned good-guy. You basically married the last Prince Charming out there. He's like a Texas Kennedy or Rockefeller. With a killer body. What? I'm not blind."

Thinking of Darcy as anything other than an arrogant, silver spoon sucking, asshole is extremely foreign to her. Perhaps it's the fact that she still isn't quite over the shock…or the hangover from hell either. Maybe she just hates to be wrong. What would that say about her?

"Lizzie," Ah sweet comforting Jane. "You need to get your shit together sweetie." Longest elevator ride ever. "You know I love you, but hun, you need to move past your issues with Will and deal with this like the smart capable adult I know is in there…somewhere." Leave it to Jane to find a way to gently and soothingly bitch slap you into reality.

Jane picked up Liz's jaw and rubbed circles on her back as the elevator doors opened on their floor. Mary brought her stupefied sister back to her senses.

"Seeing as we don't know how long this pow-wow is gonna take, let's go pack up our rooms and then meet at Lizzie's. I think we all need to freshen up and Liz looks like she needs a private moment."

The girls parted ways and Lizzie somehow managed to pack up her trashed out room. Have you ever been in a haze where you functioned on auto-pilot and don't remember doing something or even thinking about doing something, and yet it got done? Yeah that was her. Before she knew it she was all packed up and staring blankly at her wedding bed. Numb.

"_Holy fucking shit I might be pregnant RIGHT now! At this very second I could be incubating a mini-Darcy."_

Numbness gone. Time to apparently freak out. Nice.

"_I married Darce. DARCY! Mother of all fuck! I am someone's WIFE. I'M DARCY'S WIFE! I had sex with Suxwilliam Darcy. I touch his… He touched my… Oh God!" _She remembered seeing the marks they left on each other. He had scratch marks on his back and chest and a bite mark on the inside of his thigh. "_Oh shit, did I… Damnit!"_

_"Shit on a muffin! I am the biggest slut ever!" _She stared at herself in the mirror. She opted for a quick change into comfortable travel clothes. No she did not want to revisit the bite marks and hickies she spotted in the shower earlier. At least that's what she told herself. So after lying to herself, she proceeded to twist and turn to count them all. _"Thank God I wore my hair down. I didn't even_ see_ the one on the back of my neck. Wait how?...Oooooh."_

Mary, the ever efficient sister, got to Elizabeth's room first and let herself in. She found her sister face down on the carpet mumbling profanities.

"Wow Liz, this room smells like sex. Well done sis."

"I hate you"

"You love me."

"Mary I'm trying to get over this state of shock but it's so fucking hard."

"I bet it was."

"…"

"Too soon?" Mary smiled and sat next to her sister on the floor. "I know that you hate him now. I know that you can't get over this animosity you feel towards him. But you used to love him, Liz. You used to see deeper than his actions. You saw down to the man he really is. You once saw the man that no one else could see."

"I was wrong, Mary. I just wanted to see more than what was really there. I saw what I wanted to see. You can't always judge someone on first impressions."

"But they're not always wrong either. I'm not saying you don't dislike him, I'm just saying the love never really died either. You're having an inner battle over which emotion is strongest. That's probably why you're freakin' the fuck out."

"Way to put things delicately Mary. By the way, I'm loving the pigtails."

"Oh, thanks. I'm hoping to drop a subliminal sexual innuendo to Fredrick."

"Do I wanna know?"

"It may be best that you don't have the images burned into your brain."

"Hey Mare, I know that Jane loves Charles. You know really _in love_ with him. But how do you feel about Freddie? I mean I know I tease you about it, but is it really _love_?"

Mary turned her body to face her sister in all seriousness. "Yes."

"_Ooookaaay."_ She stares at her for a little while, waiting for her to elaborate.

She waits for a little more.

A little more.

"Ah Mary you gotta give me more than that! Why do you love him? How did it happen? How do you even know its love? Jesus woman! Give me the logical Mary low-down!"

"Love isn't logical."

"And…?"

"…"

"You're killing me Mare!"

"Fine! I know its love because it doesn't make sense. You know I'm a virgin, but I've done other things." Pause for Liz's pain-face to ebb away. "Oral sex and other means of genital stimulation are completely normal Elizabeth." Pause to close Liz's gaping jaw. "Now, logically speaking, I should have been able to bond in an emotional, or even hormonal way with the men I have experimented with. Not that there were that many. Yet it was never deep enough to urge me into the next step, coitus. Liz, stop giving me those looks! Shit! Like I was trying to say; Fredrick could be on the other side of the room and I feel more for him than a man manipulating my…"

"Please don't."

"clit."

"Oh dear God."

"It's more than physical. I love how loyal he is to everyone close to him. How he can put anyone at ease. Only the people I'm really close to call me witty. But he is openly funny and lighthearted. We are both different and the same. He is what I need in my life. Vibrancy. I feel I can be his calm. We would be balanced together."

"Awe Mary, that's beautiful."

"I fell for him in the O.R. He has huge massive hands that are so gentle and precise. It takes finesse to do his job so well. Delicate yet strong. Mmmm I wonder what it would feel like to have his hands on my…"

"I wonder where Jane is. Mary, don't you wonder where Jane is?"

"… all over my…"

"I wonder what's taking Jane so long. Maybe we should go get her."

"…holding on to my…"

"Hey guys I'm here."

"Oh thank you Lord Baby Jesus. Get me the fuck away from the scene of the crime… and Mary."

"Yeah Lizzie, it smells like sex in here. Are you ready? Let's go."

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**A/N: ** Yes Mary is VERY OOC. What do you think of her? She's going to play a big role in this story and her and Fred won't just magically get together. Please R&R. See you guys in at least a week.


	7. Slip of the Tongue and a Sledgehammer

Since Sunday is Easter, I decided to go ahead and post this chapter early. Please R&R and let me know what you think.

Disclaimer: Yeah, you know, I know, you know I know, and I know you know too.

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**Chapter 7: Slip of the Tongue & a Sledgehammer **

In a land far, far away… Okay in a suite three floors up; Will, Fred, and Charlie pretended to work. Charles decided to leave the conference video call on for moral and legal support. The real reason is that he doesn't want to miss seeing Jane and he's a bit pouty about missing all the drama. He manages to get a little bit of work done.

Fredrick pretends to work on precedure schedules on his laptop. He tries not to be too obvious when he glances at the door every few minutes. He can't seem to get through much work before a vision of Mary's ponytail invades his senses.

William just stares at a blank page on his laptop.

He doesn't _want_ to hate her. He doesn't even think he ever really did. He had mostly felt animosity towards her, not a deep seeded hate like her. He felt she judged him before they had ever really talked. Actually, almost all conversations between them went horribly wrong. He had worked hard throughout high school and college to get rid of his stutter but it would flare up on occasion.

The worst is when the words get mixed up. She once over heard him say part of a mangled sentence at one of the few parties he had been dragged to, "…looks…Liz c-can't t-tempt me. Don't-t ask." Charles wanted him to ask Liz to dance. He was trying to tell him that with how pretty she looked, he couldn't even attempt to ask. It sounded right in his head. He didn't know what happened to the words on the short trip from his brain to his mouth. He saw her storm away out of the corner of his eye and he felt embarrassed by his stutter then angry at her toddler-like stomping. His temper had always gotten the best of him. It seemed to overrule any other emotion and sometimes common sense.

Maybe he shouldn't have let all those little moments fester. There had been many of those moments over the years. At first he wanted to apologize each time. After the first one, he decided to walk up to her and apologize. He ended up scowling at her and only said "Cleavage." It may have come out a little harsh sounding, and the concentration on his face may have looked like a disapproving glare; but it was so _difficult_ to focus when he saw her chest. And yes, he did stare for a moment too long. That first time he thought he saw pain, disappointment, and something unidentifiable graze upon her face. After a few more mentally scarring attempts, and the 'Puke Punch' incident, he simply stopped trying. He _let_ her think the worst of him.

Perhaps he shouldn't have. He could have written her a letter or email so easily. He could have had a friend testify to his condition. He could have cleared everything up by letting her into his world. His pride got in the way. He was a Darcy; he had an image to live up to. Fear got in his way. He didn't know if he could face her rejection. As embarrassed as he has always been about his issues, he's never been so ashamed of his actions; or lack thereof.

As he placed the burden heavily on his shoulders, a timid knock came from the door.

"S-she's-s h-here."

Fredrick dashed to his cousin, put both hands on his shoulders, looked him in the eyes, and told him to breathe. He and Charlie had always helped him get through his anxiety. They had managed to keep his problems out of the spotlight and hidden. He wasn't gonna let his cousin down now. "It's alright. You got this. Relax. Breathe, Will, breathe. You okay?" Will nodded yes through another deep breath. "Good. Don't fuck this up for me." Good Ole Fred.

Will sighed a light laugh, "Get the damn door you fucker."

Darcy did not have to tell him twice.

There she was. Elizabeth Dahlia…Darcy? "_Bennet-Darcy? Mrs. Elizabeth Darcy? Hmm? Wait, what the hell am I doing? Nothing has changed. I am willing to accept my part in this bullshit, but that does not excuse Bennet from being a first class bitch."_

Two steps forward, another step back. Darcy schooled his features back into a mask of indifference. He wiped his sweaty palms on his pants and stood to greet his wife and sister-in-laws.

He walked past his cousin, who looked a bit pale, and asked them to come in. What do you say in a moment such as this? How do you convey the emotions of the moment when they are yet to be defined? For one, you don't say, "Nice to see you dressed Bennet." He had meant to compliment the simple yet tasteful wrap dress she was wearing. But at least he didn't stutter. Second, you do _not_ shake her hand like a stranger or business associate. Third, you do not say, "I believe you all know my cousin Dr. Fitzwilliam and my friend and _attorney_, Mr. Bingley." Smooth Will, real smooth.

Freddie moved in quickly to salvage what he could of the awkward moment. "Ladies please do sit and make your selves comfortable. May I offer any refreshments?" He tried to smile pleasantly and refrain from staring at Mary's ass as she turned to sit on the sofa.

When the girls said no, he moved as far away from temptation as possible. William heard him softly mumble, "Dear God help me…handle bars."

Mary, as usual, breaks the ice. With a sledgehammer. "So, no condoms, huh? How long ago was the last time you've been tested?"

"Excuse me?" Will.

"Mare!? The fuck?" Liz.

"Mary! How rude!?" Jane.

"I've been tested recently." Fred, though in a low mumble no one heard.

Charles was unfortunate enough to have been drinking a soda, and had to start cleaning his monitor, keyboard and camera…again.

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**A/N:** So, to those who celebrate; have a wonderful Good Friday. If I have the time to edit and write I may even post chapter 8 Sunday. Please R&R. Thank you to those who have decided to review, favorite, and follow my story. I will be posting a Twilight story soon. I have to warn you. It is NOT fluffy, sweet, or heart-warming. I'll let you know more soon. Thanks again.


	8. Elizabitch

Okay so I'm posting this Sunday because I have a few readers that just make me smile so much! Thank you to everyone who reviews. Seriously. Everytime I get a new review, I get so giddy that I quickly click over to the story and start writing some more. Because of those reviews, I'm a few chapters ahead.

I have one favor to ask. Don't hate Liz because of this chapter.

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**Chapter 8: Elizabitch**

"What? It's a totally valid question."

Darcy wanted to use this as a way to bring up the possibility of a baby, "Not to mention, we need to keep in mind that Elizabeth and I may very well have conceived a child last night."

"Let's not talk about that right now." Liz just could not go there yet.

"Well then, should we discuss the fact that the marriage has been discovered by the press, and what it means to you and PemMed?"

"Charles? What do you mean by that?" Jane wished that she could touch him through the flat screen. "I mean this is just considered news to society gossips. Right?"

"I'm sorry to disappoint you but this is a bit bigger than a ton of high society busybodies. Darcy is the main representative of his many ventures. _Especially_ Pemberly. It is his good name that people invest in. It could look bad on not just him, but everything he's tied to."

Liz's infamous temper started to rise. "I swear I'm not trying to sound like a bitch, but why should _I_ care about compromising his reputation? This isn't just about the Almighty Darcy. This is my life too."

William was conflicted. He wanted to talk more about the possibility of having a child. He wanted to ensure her that he'd be there. He wanted…He honestly didn't know what he wanted anymore. He still felt guilty for taking away her virtue. Wouldn't most women be more concerned about that instead of just dismissing it as she did? He wanted to speak but everything froze in his painfully tight throat.

"Elizabeth, it reaches deeper than you think. The government _allows_ PemMed try and test out new life-saving medical technologies. They _allow_ cutting edge techniques to be studied and developed there. They give us the financial flexibility to treat more patients for less money so that anyone and everyone that walks into the hospital, or even the numerous clinics, will be _allowed_ the best treatments from the best doctors." Charlie sighs with frustration. "And that is just one angle out of a dozen more. Even if Will used his own money and took funds from other ventures, he'd lose valuable connections from developers and companies within the same field. Like pharmaceutical companies who gives us deep discounts just so that they can be associated with the illustrious PemMed and companies that develop new medical equipment who can boast that Pemberly Medical uses their gear. If Will goes down, it can damage more than just his reputation."

"Breath Lizzie, breath. Sorry guys, my sister tends to freak out a bit. She zones out. Anger is also her favorite defense mechanism." Jane wrapped an arm around her and gives her a good squeeze only to receive the famous bitch brow in return.

Mary stands up with her iPad and paces. "Do you mind if I tap that?" She says as she points to the screen. Freddie almost choked. Mary did her thing and Charlie shrunk to half the screen. On the left everyone could see what Mary had on her tablet.

"Can you see that as well Charles?"

"That's so cool. I want one."

"I'll take that as a yes. Okay from what I can see so far, public opinion is, for the most part, favorable." Mary flicked her finger as pictures and small articles pop up. "Here's one that sums up what they perceive of your 'secret romance'."

Up pop several pictures of Liz and Will at various charity balls and medical events. Some have Lizzie looking at Darce or vice versa. Both have pained looks on their faces that are being perceived as lover's angst. The article paints them as being so much in love that it hurts to be so close and not be able to touch. Awe. Another similar article uses even more photos and assumes that they have kept it from the public because of the work situation. They even traced them back to college. It goes on to say that they grew tired of hiding their love and threw all care and caution to the wind by getting married in Vegas.

"Two years Lizzie." Bingley sounded almost desperate. "Give it two years before you file for divorce."

Her jaw _and_ stomach dropped at that one. "What?"

"Liz, Sweetie, Charlie has a point. It won't be so bad. Plus, hun, consider the possibility that you might be…" Jane hugged her a little tighter but Liz shrugged her off and stood up.

"I'm not taking that into consideration right now! Look I'm not an idiot. I get it I really do. But two fucking years? Are you insane? Six months tops!"

Fred put a hand on Will's shoulder to help keep him calm. He whispered, "Stay calm Will. We don't know if she means to…you know."

As Darcy watched her argue with Bing and her sisters, he whispered back, "It takes f-forty weeks Fred. Three t-trimesters. She is fighting for a divorce in s-six months. Six."

They watched as Mary tried to persuade and Jane tried to calm.

"Eighteen months. It'll look too shady if you dissolve your marriage too soon. Liz, _if _you're pregnant you gotta consider…"

"There is nothing to consider Mare! I'll take care of it!"

Lizzie turned when she heard a loud gasp. She didn't want to see the contempt on his face. "This isn't how I had planned my life. Jane, you're the one who dreams of white picket fences and a dozen kids playing in the yard." Jane blushed at Charlie's wide grin and dream-filled eyes. "And Mary, you're the one who actively socializes and dates and...stuff." Poor Will had to suffer a Vulcan-like death grip on his shoulder from his cousin during that last sentence. "I just wanted to be a surgeon. That's all."

William always knew that her career would always come first. That had been one of the things that had drawn him in, back in the day when he worshipped her. She had drive, so much determination. She would never let anything or anyone derail her.

"_Nothing would get in her way. Nothing."_

Darcy couldn't let this go on any longer. He found a strength within him that he hadn't known existed. Without pause, without a stutter he approached Elizabeth.

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**A/N:** Okay so one more favor. Don't hate me for the way I ended this chapter.

So what do you think he says/does?

I won't lie. I might update sooner if I get reviews. Am I blackmailing you? That is such an ugly word. Let's call it an insentive. heehee Love you guys!


	9. Thrown Into the Deep End

**Wow! THANK YOU!** I got so many reviews I couldn't deny you any longer. I'll shut up now and let you read.

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**Chapter 9: Thrown Into the Deep End**

"That is IT! I have heard quite enough!" He ran a tense hand trough his hair and refused to yell anymore. He failed. "I have the resources to work from home. Hell my main office is in a fuckin' hospital. I don't care if I have to put a fuckin' crib next to my desk and a nursery in the God damn conference room! Bennet if you are indeed pregnant,… all I ask is for you to carry him or her to term." Darcy was so distraught he almost whispered the last half of the sentence.

Mary and Jane looked at each other as they instantly came to understand.

The moment seemed to blur, yet it was also in slow-motion. Liz's infamous temper almost visibly rose as she opened her mouth and made a b-line towards the mo-fo who dared to yell at her. Never mind _what_ he said, he was gonna get it. Darcy steeled his gaze and straightened his spine as if readying himself for battle. Liz only got so far as, "Look here asshole…" before Mary almost dislocated her shoulder.

"Excuse me but I believe I need to have a private word with my big sis." Mary tugged a pissed off Elizabitch, uh Lizzie, off towards the bathroom. She communicated to Jane without words to get her to calm down the guys and explain the misunderstanding.

Darcy's fists were shaking at his sides. He barely registered Fredrick's voice as he talked with Jane. "He has OCD coupled with mild anxiety attacks. We've helped him with his stutter and his attacks aren't so bad that they're noticeable. That's why he doesn't talk much and you always see him with me and/or Bing around. Just give him a moment to calm down."

As William's heart rate started to stabilize, Mary was trying to not hit her sister upside her head. She dragged her into the bathroom, locked the door, and sat her down on the toilet. Liz was still pissed, "How dare he fucking talk to me like that!" She shot up to walk back out but Mary sat her back down.

With both hands on her Liz's shoulders, to both keep her captive and to convey her seriousness, she looked into her eyes, "I love you Liz, no matter what. But you're the asshole here. And if you don't shut-up and calm your bitchiness down, you'll end up hating yourself."

Elizabeth was dumbstruck. She has always known that she had a temper. That anger was the way she coped with her vulnerability. Like an animal who felt cornered, she'd lash out.

"Now, Elizabeth Dahlia Bennet," Full name? Oh Shit! She's in trouble now. "I want you to sit there and contemplate _exactly _what Will just said."

While Lizzie tried to make sense of the last few minutes, Jane was busy explaining the special brand of crazy her little sister had eaten. "Okay, so I know what it sounded like, but let me assure you that if she's carrying a Baby Darcy, she would _never_ ever get…oh God…she'd never even contemplate doing _that_. Ever."

Charlie wished he could be there. Jane looked like she could use someone to lean on. Even under stress she was absolutely stunning. Her devotion to her sister made him smile. Which was actually a bit inappropriate at that particular moment. Thank God his secretary brought in his pizza to help cover his lack of grace. When in doubt, shove food in your mouth. It not only erases inappropriate smiles, it also acts as a preventative against saying something stupid to gorgeous blondes.

"Jane, it's no s-secret that Dr. Bennet has _always_ put her c-career ahead of everything. The first issue I w-wanted to discuss-s was the possibil…" Darcy needed to stop and take second to gather himself. "You can hardly blame me for coming to the same conclusion Charles and Fredrick did. Even you admit it sounded like she was planning to terminate…I can't even finish the thought. Are you sure she doesn't mean to do it? Have you already talked about it?"

Jane sighed softly and rubbed her temples. How could Lizzie not see this man for what he truly is? Or rather, how could she forget, how could she be so blind? "We don't have to talk about it. We know each other very well. I know that when she said it wasn't a consideration, it's because in her mind there's nothing to talk about. She'd have the baby, it didn't need to be said out loud. When she said she'd take care of it, she meant she'd raise him or her. And although having the typical two-kids-and-a-dog lifestyle was never a dream of hers, she would never give up on her own child." Jane's confidence in her answer helped settle Will's fear and blood pressure. "Nor would she turn away from love if it ever came her way." Blood pressure spike.

Mary was trying extremely hard not to resort to mild acts of violence. "You mean he'd _take_ my child from me! Oh hell no!"

She tried to stand but Mary sat her back down. "I'm not above slapping you. A love tap across the head wouldn't injury the baby."

"But Mare…"

"Stop Elizabeth. Just stop. I want you to understand _why_ He said it. I want you to stop being a brat and look at things from his point of view. The first thing he wanted to address was the possible pregnancy. You however, shut him down."

"But..."

Mary held up her hand to stop her. "Then you pushed for six months even though you could be well into your confinement at that point."

"Mare you're not…"

"Then when I tried to get you factor in the thought of a child, you said it wasn't a 'consideration' and that you'd 'take care of it'."

"Oh God."

"Then in true Lizzie fashion, you spout out a speech about not wanting anything but your career."

"But Mare you _know_ I would never…"

"Yes Liz, both Jane and I know. But how would anyone else know that?" Lizzie was about to cry. Mary knelt down to look straight at her sister. "God, you must be scared to death. You only get this mad when you're afraid. You must be terrified. He's a good man. I think part of your fear is being wrong and that you never really stopped loving him."

Mary cradled her and rubbed her back as she softly wept. Jane was the soother in the family, but she wasn't a robot. Pat, pat, circle, circle, and a little sqeeze.

"Oh God, Mary! He must think I'm such a fucking bitch. He must think...Oh God." Lizzie felt her chest tighten.

Mary let her suffer. Maybe it made her a bad sister. But maybe it would help her realize what everyone else had already figured out. Some people needed gentle nudges. Jane was fond of subtle pushes. Some people needed to get thrown into the deep end. Or slapped upside the head. Mary liked the direct approach. Sure she could tell her that Jane has been smoothing everything over in the living room. But it wouldn't quite have the profound effect she was looking for.

"Liz, have you noticed that you are crying over the thought of him sitting out there thinking ill of you?" She sighed at Liz's confused look. "You care about what he thinks of you." She handed her more toilet paper. She was not a pretty crier. Snot. Red nose. Snot. Red puffy eyes. Snot. "After all the years of being 'The Bennet Freaks', you _never_ cared so much about what other people thought. Except him." She let that sink in before she told her that Jane had probably finished calming down the boys.

Jane was caught staring at Charlie after Darcy settled down. "Jane?" Charlie wanted to ask her out so bad.

"Oh sorry Charles. I was looking at the pizza. I guess all the excitement stirred up an appetite." Shot down.

"Pizza sounds good. I'll order room service. Any special requests?" Freddie wasn't aware of how hungry he actually was.

"Perhaps a pot of chamomile tea? I'd appreciate it. Oh, and chocolate cake. We'll definitely need something chocolate."

Darcy mumble something about hamburgers and moved to the couch. He sat with a loud huff and leaned his head back to stare at the ceiling. "_What the hell am I gonna do? Should I be firm? Should I let her take the reins? Exactly how much does she hate me? Did I ever really get over her? Why do I keep asking myself that? Okay so yes, her world has come to a bit of a turn in less than twenty-four hours. But God, she can be such a selfish brat sometimes! Her life. Her career. Her goals."_ But he also knew there was more to her than that. So much more. His thoughts migrated to his sister. He needed to talk to her. He didn't want her to find out from anyone but him.

He hadn't realized how long he sat like that until room service came through one door and Elizabeth came out another. She looked like she had been crying. He had an unsettling feeling quake within him. He wanted to comfort and protect her. Her anger was gone and she looked so vulnerable. So human. Yes, there was so much more to this woman than meets the eye. So much more.

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**A/N: So what do you guys think? Thank you so much for all the reviews. I want my virtual bunnies now. LOL! I seriously got a lot of writing done. On Chapter 14 now. Have you ever made a cake that everyone seemed to love, so then you go home and start baking again? Or you get a lot of compliments on an outfit or piece of jewelry and you subliminaly wear it more often? That's me. I'll admit it. I'm that big of a dork. Don't judge...LOL!**


	10. HUG HIM

**Alright I am posting this chapter in addition to another coming up Sunday. Why? Everyone can thank kamarooka. I LOVE her story and made a deal concerning bunnies and updates. There may also have been begging. Also I want to thank everyone for all the reviews.**

**Disclaimer: Austen rocked it first. And better.**

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**Chapter 10: Hug Him! **

Nobody knew what to say. It was obvious that she felt horrible that she caused the men to assume the worst of her. She felt even worse when Darcy offered her dinner. She knew he could have rubbed it in her face. She had been angry and defensive for no other reason than her own fears. She had no right to take it out on everyone else when it was her actions that caused all of this. Darcy looked at her with absolute concern. She was both relieved and ashamed. She felt that he _should_ yell at her. That she deserved his indignation and that he should do _something_ to castigate her. Just a minute ago she wanted to be angry at him for even thinking she was capable of such a thing. And now she was finally angry at the right person, herself.

Everyone made their way to the table to fix their plates. The Bennet sisters watched as Darcy put a hamburger patty on a slice of pizza, then add another slice upside down on top of it. A pizza burger. Really? Yes, really. Freddie smiled at his cousin and did the same.

The sisters moved to the couch, which is in front of the flat screen, mostly for Jane's sake. They tried to make small talk but failed in an epic way. Knowing it was up to her to grow up and tighten her bra straps, Lizzie shot the elephant in the room. "One year, with an option to extend if I, um…if we conceived a child."

Poor Charles Bingley, "Damnit! Do you people _intentionally_ wait for me to be drinking when you say shit like that? God, it came outta my nose this time!"

Lizzie didn't know what shocked her more, the fact that Darcy could laugh, or the fact that it made her want to make him laugh more. She had heard a few fake and forced attempts at laughter from him when somebody made horrid jokes at social gatherings. He even did that I'm-laughing-at-your-stupidity kinda chuckle. You know you do it too. But this, this was bright yet deep at the same time. Tingle. She found herself laughing more because of him than Charlie. "_What the hell is the matter with me?! Okay, stop. Don't start that stupid shit again. Calm down the bitchitude girl."_

Once the laughter died down Fred asked the obvious. "So what do you mean about the 'option to extend'?

All eyes were on her. Her sisters looked eager and hopeful, the men looked pretty much confused. It could also be indigestion from the pizza burgers. She took a deep breath and tried to put her rambling thoughts into words. She was scared to do it on her own, to be a single parent. She knew she could do it on her own. But she didn't _want _to. She wanted someone to be there and make everything alright. She _needed_ someone to be vulnerable with. Yes, she had family, but she needed the only other person who could understand her position. How do you express an emotional need like that? "Daycare. If I am pregnant, and want to continue to work, I'll need someone who is willing to be there for him or her. I can't let my sisters take responsibility for what we did last night. Who better than the father who has already expressed the will to make adjustments to accommodate a child?" Way to be vulnerable Lizzie. "I can adjust my schedule to three days off instead of two, and Darcy can go into the office on those days." Yea, that made it all better didn't it. Genius.

Jane leaned into Mary, "She gets that from you."

Mary smacks her forehead with her palm. "Okay. Well that does sound…logical."

Jane shot up from the couch and pulled Mary with her. "Alrighty! Now that that is finally settled; let's get on with the rest."

Puzzled, Liz looked at the smirk on Jane's face, "_And here I thought only Mary had an evil genius smile."_

Jane walked towards William as she talked. "Now that you are married, and will be for at least a year," She pulled him up to walk with her back to the couch. "You will have to start looking and acting like it." With more strength than Darcy thought she had; Jane pushed him down on the couch almost on top of Elizabeth.

Cue evil Mary grin. "Oh, this is gonna be fun!"

Darcy paled. Liz blushed. Jane sipped her tea. "First things first. You two need to get comfortable around each other."

Freddie decided that he may not be able to save his cousin this time. In fact he didn't think he should. He and Charlie would still be there, of course, but now Will needed to let someone else stand by him. "Elizabeth there's something you need to know."

Will looked indifferent…extremely pale with troubled dilated pupils, but the mask maintained. Fred knew the truth, Will wanted to run and hide. Lock himself away and never come out. He never wanted to tell her, but now it was a necessity. Will leaned forward, his elbows on his knees, and hung his head in his hands, defeated. He couldn't look at her…at anyone.

"Will has a small case of OCD. He also has to deal with mild anxiety attacks every so often. They aren't so severe that he needs to be medicated. He just experiences a rapid heart-rate, spiked blood pressure, dizziness, and some very mild breathing issues. Not so much that he'll hyperventilate. Usually. He also has a bit of a stutter when he gets overly nervous. That's why he avoids talking to people, especially strangers, and when he does, its usually as short as he can get away with. He gets bad around crowds." Will visibly shuddered. He alluded to Liz about some of his problems earlier, but having them spelled out to her made him cringe.

He felt and awkward hand on his back. "Circle, circle, pat, pat. There you go. Sometimes you should throw in a shoulder squeeze and/or a hug. Go ahead Sweetie give it a try." Yes, Jane had to _show_ Elizabeth how to comfort her husband. She couldn't stand it! Liz just sat there with a scared yet sympathetic look on her face. She raised her hand several times like she wanted to hold his hand or console him in some way, only to shy away. "_Hell no! Not on my watch! Hug him bitch…HUG HIM!"_

Seeing the unspoken message written across her sister's face, Liz relented. She held her breath and leaned in.

Darcy felt her hand glide across his upper back and he stiffened. He felt her other hand gently hold onto his bicep. The smell of lavender grew stronger and stronger until he felt her head lean on his shoulder. He inhaled as if to consume part of her fire to give him courage.

She felt his muscles harden. Oh yes, she had seen his _very_ well-built and toned body earlier, but feeling it under her fingers was so much…more. She felt like she wanted her touch to absorb all his pain. Somehow it seemed to erase _her_ anger and tension.

At the same time, they both released their breath. It was a moment that lasted less than half a minute. It was a moment that didn't quite register to everyone as significant. But it was their moment. Perhaps made even more significant, because it was theirs and theirs alone.

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A/N: OOOOHHHH they had a moment. Don't you wanna hug 'em?

Tell me what you think. Oh and yes there will be a Collins and a Wick. They will be headed home soon. After a few more 'moments'. BTW no I do not know how long this fic will be. Sorry. I have the plot outlined but don't know how many chapters it will take.

P.S. In celebration the 10th chapter and breaking 100 followers, I will be posting my Twilight Mob fic. I won't be offended if you don't like it. Both of the heroes of the story are 'bad people' who kill others and do other illegal stuff.

Sending Crazy Love to all of you guys that review often. You know who you are.


	11. Mother of--Damn It!

**Okay. I just wanted to remind everyone that this story is listed under romance and Humor. That means it won't always be sensible, and that no matter how smart the characters are suppose to be; they're gonna act like idiots. Just saying. Now, introducing the least sensible Bennet...**

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**Chapter 11: Mother of…Damn It!**

Darcy placed a hand over the one Elizabeth had on his arm. The gleam from his wedding band distracted him and he had yet to raise his eyes to her. Bathed in the soft scent of lavender, he felt a calm settle into his tight muscles. If he would've looked up, he would have seen a peaceful contentment smooth away the angry scowl she once had. What would he have said or done if he had gotten the chance to see that small amount of harmony in her eyes? What would have changed if Elizabeth had seen how much her touch had healed him?

Unfortunately for all parties involved, Mrs. Bennet has the worst timing, and Mary has the worst ring ID for her. When _White Wedding _blared from Mary's purse,William and Elizabeth jumped up and away from each other as if caught in the middle of a Lydia-like situation.

Gotta love Billy Idol.

"Sorry 'bout that. Damn where the… got it. Hey Mom, how's it going?" Both sisters simultaneously slapped palms to their foreheads.

"Why Jane, why would she answer a call for her? Do you think she knows?" Even sweet gentle Jane had to give her the 'Duh' look.

Mary walked to the girls, "Mom I'm putting you on speaker and you are going to lower your voice, understand?" Mary put her on mute to quickly tell them all, "It's best to get this over with before she leaks something simple-minded to the press." They stood circling the phone.

All the men cringed at the reverberating shrieking sound spilling out of the phone. They all worried about how mad her mother must be. Apparently they don't speak the required language to communicate with this particular breed of Bennet either. They soon found out those screeching sounds were happy and approving, and, to their shock, coming from only one person.

Not knowing if they should stay or give them privacy, Darcy moved to the kitchen area with Freddie. Charlie sat there either looking at Jane's ass as she and her sisters stood around a phone, or was re-reading one of the articles from earlier. The later would be what he'd admit to.

The boys had never witnessed such a fast-paced, confusing, and yet highly entertaining conversation. They could hardly ascertain which sister said what.

"Oh Lizzie Dear, I'm so bloody happy!"

"Mom, for the last time, you are NOT British!" Liz.

"What a sneak you are Lizzie! Oh you're so clever to snag such a rich man!"

"Mom, I told you already that he's in the room. Behave!" Mary.

"Oh I'm sure he's perfectly aware of how rich he is! Oh, Lizzie I'm so happy to have a daughter so well married!"

"Yes, because this is all about you." Exasperated Liz.

"Oh my God! Lindy Lucas is gonna just DIE when I tell her the news!"

"Mom, you will NOT broadcast MY business all over Texas!" Irritated Liz.

"Oh calm down! You don't want your husband to think he married a drama queen! You have no sympathy for my poor nerves!"

"For the love of…Mom, you do not have a nervous condition." Annoyed Mary.

"Remember Mom, we had you tested." Jane.

"Three times!" Highly annoyed Mary.

"Moving on, Dears."

"Yeah, 'cause we don't want my husband to think his new mother-in-law is a drama queen." Pissed off Liz.

"Lizzie, just think of all the jewelry, cars, and vacations!"

"Mother, Lizzie didn't marry Will for his money. Trust me on this." Slightly peeved Jane.

"Oh Jane you must spend as much time with them as possible. I'm positive that he must have many other wealthy friends. I'm sure if Lizzie can snag a man like him, you could do just as well, if not better!"

"MOTHER!" All three, in various states of embarrassment.

"What!? Lizzie dear you know I love you, but you're simply not as beautiful as my Jane. And although you're not as plain as Mary, you're certainly not as smart."

"Just hang up on her. For the love of all things chocolate, I'm fucking begging you." Humiliated Liz.

"Mom, Mary _is_ beautiful! And Liz is extremely intelligent! You shouldn't say things like that. It's hurtful." Insulted and protective Jane.

Mrs. Bennet continued to ignore what she didn't want to listen to, and talk over daughters. "All I'm saying is that if a girl like Lizzie can get a man like him to marry her, then it will be a very simple matter finding Jane a husband."

Darcy couldn't understand the collective groaning and moaning coming from the girls. He felt the need to say something. Yeah, not gonna happen. Just the thought of talking to this woman on the_ phone_ scared the crap outta him.

"Lizzie, I hope you are keeping your high opinions to yourself! And for his sake, please try to control that sharp tongue of yours!" Liz was grateful her mother couldn't see the shame on her face. "Lord bless that poor man for having to deal with the likes of you. I do believe the best strategy would be to get pregnant soon. It may be your only hope." She tried, unsuccessfully to whisper the last few sentences.

"Mother, really! You should not talk to Lizzie that way. You are going to ruin the moment for the new couple." Smart Mary, smart.

"Mary it would be good for you to be around the happy couple too. You might be able to find a man that doesn't mind your…_uniqueness._"

Collective groan. Seems the girls are growing exhausted by their mother.

"I'm just trying to help! You girls don't want to die virgins do you?!"

Bing had to actually get up this time to change his shirt. No one heard him curse and excuse himself to his private bathroom nor did they notice the soda that obstructed the view.

Darcy internally cringed at the reminder. The girls had all simultaneously stiffened and then flopped down on the sofa with fatigue.

Freddie looked pale, and yet the tips of his ears turned bright red as he bit down on his fist. Will decided he _really_ didn't want to know what was going on in his head.

"Mother please be mindful that we are not alone. Mr. Darcy is within ear-shot. He doesn't need his first impression of his mother-in-law to be based on this phone call." Frustrated Jane.

"Oh yes! Yes, yes! When can I meet my new son?! I want you to come here as soon as you can. We can have a barbeque to welcome him into the family."

"How 'bout never? Or when hell freezes over? You just want to parade him around like a show pony." Tired Liz.

"What she means is that the media is all over this, and it will be a while before they can visit Mom." Quick-witted Mary. "Which brings up the subject. Mom, NO talking to reporters, newspapers, magazines, TMZ, gossip rags, or paparazzi. We are not going to give you any details about them or their relationship." Mrs. Bennet made futile attempts to interject. "Don't go gossiping all over Texas to your friends either. Just tell them that they met in college and started dating about a year after she was hired at Pemberly Medical. Mr. Darcy will be releasing a statement to the press, and if you let anything different leak out, you will be perceived as being a liar and a bad parent for not really knowing what happened." Mary has superpowers. She got Mrs. Bennet to shut up. Everyone loves Mary.

"Hmph. Well, Lizzie congratulations, and your father wants you to call him when you get home. Oh, and I expect a visit as soon as you two can make it. Bye dears!" That was not an invitation. That was a threat. If Liz doesn't drag her new husband to Austin, her mother is gonna make her way to San Antonio. All three girls shuttered. The horror, the horror.

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A/N: Okay so the longest day ever is about to wrap up soon. Once Liz moves in with Will things will move a bit faster. I just want to say thanks to everyone who reads and reviews. And yes they will have a private moment...after all the interruptions are done.


	12. Lessons on Being a Spouse

**Thank you everyone. So here the happy couple come to a bit of self-discovery.**

**Disclaimer: Jane owns it. I only wish I did.**

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**Chapter 12**

Mary. God love her. "You two need to get your shit together. Here is how this is gonna happen. You Elizabeth, are going to move in with William because you married him. Also because you could be knocked up. And, more importantly, because I said so."

Lizzie was tempted. So very tempted; but she checked herself, _"She's right. She's right. Hold back the urge to bitch. Hold it. Hold it."_

"You William, will help her move her stuff into your home. You will allow her to make changes to said home in order to make her feel welcome. Why? Because you are a gentleman. Liz is the one that has to change venues, and of course because I said so. Clear?" All he could do was nod. "Good. Now, you are going to share the same bedroom."

_"Hold it back Lizzie girl. Hold it!"_

_"…Shit…Bedroom…Fuck…Share…Crap…With Bennet…Fuck my life!"_

"As a couple you will need to keep up appearances and NO ONE outside of this room; even family or household staff needs to know about this meeting. You are grown-ups and I'm sure you can be mature about this." She honestly just wanted to force them to get…comfortable with each other. She kept a stern look on her face. She almost dared them to challenge her. "Darcy, you will start acting like a husband and limit your time at the office. You will be home at a decent hour every day, take Liz out to social obligations, and every week you will have a 'date night'. This will ensure that public perception stays positive. We don't want people to think you two aren't a happy couple."

Liz had a smug look on her face as she looked at Darcy who was both shocked and immensely intimidated. Mary didn't like her attitude. "Lizzie, you will also have to start acting like a wife. No more taking extra shifts just for the hell of it. If he can be home at a practical hour, so can you. Not only will you go to social functions with him, you will be supportive…not to be confused with submissive, and you will NOT make snide comments or undermine him in front of people. You will also help him with his anxiety and shyness. You will take the time to learn how to help him get through those kinds of situations. Understood?"

Darcy looked vindicated. Liz looked pouty.

Mary looked to an overly ecstatic Janie. She looked like she would burst. "My turn!"

She again dragged the happy couple over to the couch. Maybe she shouldn't be enjoying this so much. Maybe she should take it easy with them. Would she be a bad sister if she locked them in a room with food, water, condoms, and porn being played on a continuous loop? Maybe. What? The porn was a gift from Mary. She said it would be educational. And it was… Don't judge.

"Okay, hold hands." Will tried to discreetly wipe his palm on his leg before Liz slipped her hand in his. "Nope, you're doing it wrong. Lace your fingers together, it conveys a stronger passion."

"I had no idea there was a right and wrong way to hold hands Jane."

Darcy just did what he was told without question. He was starting to think estrogen was his kryptonite; the longer he was exposed, the weaker he felt.

"Okay now when you sit together, make sure that you are always touching in some manner. Like holding hands, laying a hand on a thigh, or leaning close to each other. Will, you could put an arm around her shoulders or waist, or even around the back of the chair she's sitting in. Lizzie, you can lean your head on his shoulder like earlier or even drape a hand there or at the base of his neck."

"So there are instructions on how to sit with each other? Should I be taking notes?"

Darcy just looked at Elizabeth like a Sudoku puzzle he couldn't figure out. _"So an arm around the waist…Am I allowed to put a hand at the base of her neck or is that a girls only move? Maybe it would seem too domineering. What if the chairs are too far apart? Do I move the chair closer? _

"If you feel it necessary, go ahead Sweetie. I know, we need a visual aid. Mary? Freddie? Would you be a couple of dears, and help me out?" Jane tried not to smile too big. Failed.

Charlie hit his head down on his desk, _"Why?"_ Thump!_ "Why did I stay home?"_ Thump! He straightened up before Jane turned to see what the noise was. "Dropped a stapler. Don't mind me." He continued to take notes. Hey, a good idea, is a good idea no matter where it came from.

Darcy crossed his arms and raised a hand to his chin as he stood and watched Jane move and manipulate the bodies of the all too willing Mary and Freddie into various positions. Liz looked on but kept glancing at Darcy. _"He's kinda cute when he concentrates like that. A little imposing and intimidating too. Hot."_ Then he did the move with the glasses. You know…sweep them off the face and hold the end to your mouth with the look of being deep in thought. She was taken back to freshman year. _"He just brought SMEXY back! Fuck my life. Damnit now that song is stuck in my head!"_

Meanwhile Freddie was mentally fist pumping as Mary touched him all over. She decided to add her own moves too. Like wrapping both arms around his waist and snuggling her head into his chest. He was being a supportive cousin when he showed him how to hold her with her back to his chest and his head on her shoulder. Mary heard him sniff her strawberry shampoo. She did a happy Snoopy dance…on the inside of course.

"Some of these…er…positions may not be suitable for some occasions. You may need to make some judgment calls." Jane tried not to smirk as she watched Mary linger a little longer than needed in Fredrick's arms. Failed again.

"Now for standing."

Liz was about to say something. _"Standing? Really? Is this fucking for real?"_ She looked to Darcy. She stopped. He was really learning from this. No one ever told him what to do or how to do it. He never acquired the social skills or experience to truly grasp this. Lizzie didn't really have any experience either but she understood social cues better. Jane was understanding enough to see that this was essential, and did her best to make it less embarrassing for him. She was already failing as a wife. She gave herself a mental slap in the face and moved to stand by her husband. She made sure her feet angle toward him, not away, and leaned into him with one hand on his arm, the other holding his hand, and her head resting on his bicep. She was too short to rest it on his shoulder. _"Wow my husband's tall. My husband…"_

William, unaware of Lizzie's epiphany, moved her to imitate the Jane approved position his cousin had Mary in. He found he liked having her in front of him facing forward. He felt like he was borrowing her strength and courage. He also liked bending his chin down and placing it on her lavender scented head. _"Would it creep her out if I smelled her hair? If it doesn't, would it be allowed in public? What's the policy on public sniffing? Wow my wife is short. I have to bend down just to get a good whiff. Mmm calming laven…whoa, my…my wife."_

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A/N: So peace and cooler head prevail. Let me know what you guys think.


	13. Vegas LIED

**Hello people. Good news and bad news. Here's the good: We just made it to 100 reviews! Yea! **

**Here's the bad: If you read my profile I had cancer. I'm in remission, but I'm still sick. (chemo really takes a toll) I suffered from a fainting spell...on the stairs. So I've been drugged and homebound. Long story short; I may not be able to post on Sunday. So right now before I am drugged up again and can't remember my name; I present lucky chapter 13.**

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**Chapter 13: Vegas Lied, It Did NOT Stay in Vegas!**

Liz was actually happy after all the 'lessons' were over. And not _just_ because they were finished, but also because she and Will were more comfortable with bodily contact, and she has to admit she learned stuff. Apparently there are people who read body language. Some postures and gestures mean protectiveness, passion, or possessiveness. Move, or tilt in a subtle way and boom, people think you're headed for divorce. _"But what's up with all the hair sniffing?"_

Will was just happy to have a better understanding of what's considered normal public behavior.

"Okay, I think we have overwhelmed the newlyweds enough for one day. Maybe we should let them have some time alone." Fredrick really just wanted to have a better chance to talk with Mary. When she laid the law down on Will and Liz, he almost had a seizure. Then holding her…Well, now that he knows what she smells like and how her body just seems to fit perfectly with his…spank bank deposit.

"Sorry guys, but your flight leaves soon." Charles had arranged for a car to pick them up inside the private parking sub-garage. He also bought out many of the first class seats so they would be able to have a bit more privacy. Yeah he actually did accomplish _some_ work at his desk. "I also arranged to have dinner set up at Will's place. You should be home by seven. Will and Liz will go straight home while the rest of you go to Liz's place to grab more clothes and stuff. Freddie will guide you back to Will's ranch. Will, I have arranged your schedule so that you have four days off. You may have some small things to do, but nothing that would drag you back here. Liz, Dr. Gardiner got Fred's schedule notes and got you two days off in a row then you work one and then off again for two. We're gonna try to tweak it a bit."

Liz tried to not glare at Freddie. _"How DARE he fucking mess with MY job! He can't just do that shit! He should have fucking asked!"_

Now, Darcy is the first to admit that he isn't the most enlightened man when it comes to female emotions. Then again what man is? But when it comes to Elizabeth, he _knows _anger, annoyance, and loathing. Normally He would let his cousin rot. It would have been extremely entertaining to see her wrath directed towards someone else. He magnanimously decided to spare his cousin. He took a deep breath and leaned into Elizabeth before she launched herself into a new rant.

Lizzie felt Darce lean close to her. His hand lightly swept across her lower back and her rage started to dissipate. His voice was low and slightly husky; his breath tickles when he whispers in her ear. "Now Bennet, he was just trying contribute and help in his own way. Your sisters have done so much and both my friends wanted to be there for us. Besides, we are supposed to honeymooners hiding away from the world."

Lizzie swallowed hard as he moved back. "Mmhmm. Yeah, um, I guess. Uh yeah, that er, makes sense. Thanks Fredrick."

"Well you guys only have about fifteen minutes to pack and get your asses down there. You can all leave the keys on the coffee table, housekeeping will pick them up. I better go. I'll meet you at Will's." Charles signed off and sighed. He was determined to ask Jane out the first chance he got a minute alone with her. He realized while watching his friends that he didn't want to be afraid of rejection anymore. He now feared regret for inaction and loneliness instead.

Darcy and Fred excused themselves to finish packing. Both men were equal parts enlightened and confused. Will appreciated all the new knowledge of social norms for couples, but he was no closer to understanding the woman he married. Soon, they would be left alone together. The thought made his heart palpitate. Sure they were getting along _now_ with everyone around, but what will happen when the buffer was gone? You can't just erase all those years of animosity or fear. Will tried to clear his mind by folding his boxers and socks and arranging them by color.

Fredrick now knew almost too much, _"She's a virgin, she dates, she has a mild addiction to chocolate, she smells like strawberries, she has a soft but strong body, and her mom annoys her." _However, this wealth of knowledge came with more questions, _"Is she waiting for marriage? Who is she dating? Where does he live? If I covered myself in chocolate syrup…?" _You don't wanna know the rest.

The sisters sipped tea and nibbled on their second slice of cake. The first one didn't count. It was the 'stress' slice, the second is the 'real' dessert.

"You do know you _are _gonna have to have a conversation with him soon…without us being there." Why did Mary have to open her mouth during dessert? It almost ruins it, almost.

"I'm sure he's just as nervous as you, if not, even more so." Ah, sweet Jane…the _nice_ sister. "And really Sweetie, could you be a dear and try not to be such a bitch to him?" Damn…just…damn. If _Jane_ is calling her out for being a bitch it has to be bad. "Is it really fair to blame him for everything?"

"No, but it's been a hobby of mine for quite some time now."

"Okay Liz, you wanna go that route? Fine. Let's start the blame game." Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit. Mary put her serious face on. You know the; you're-not-gonna-make-it-out-alive face.

Lizzie actually felt her deodorant fail.

And then she was saved by the OCD tendencies of an ever punctual Will Darcy. "Everyone ready?"

Fred and Will tried to lighten the girls' loads as best they could as they made their way to the SUV Charles arranged for them. Only their heads were visible under the weight of all the bags and they seemed to waddle like penguins. Liz and Mary wanted to giggle at their chivalry, Jane wished Charles was there.

Luckily they were able to board the plane without too many people recognizing them. The happy couple awkwardly practiced their socially acceptable PDA as they sat together. "What no private jet Darce?" Liz teased. She cringed a half second after and wanted to slap herself. A quick glance at her sisters told her they had the same urge.

Before she could apologize, Darcy looked to her with a raised eyebrow. Liz tried to hold back a grin. Darce has his own _bitch brow_! And it was kinda hot. Kinda. "The plane is with my sister Bennet. She is visiting our Aunt Catherine in California."

"Oh, right, I remember her saying she was gonna go see her before the fall semester started. Oh my God! What? How are we gonna tell her?" Lizzie freaked. She loved Giana! Liz and her sisters took her in and kinda adopted her. She desperately needed female companionship and guidance. And self-confidence.

"I imagine we'll _Skype_ and tell her together. We'll read her response and decide how much she needs to know." Darcy didn't want to damage her and Elizabeth's friendship. Georgiana has blossomed into a confident and strong young lady. She had been such a shy little thing. He was sure Wickham's attack would have broken her. The Bennet sisters saved her life. Now she knows how to defend herself both verbally and physically. She still has her scars, physical and otherwise, but she has persevered.

"I just don't want her to hate me Darce."

"Bennet, I don't think that's possible." He watched stare at nothing and bite her thumbnail in worry. _"I don't think it possible for anyone to hate you. Not even me."_

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Okay, so I'm leaving my daughter in charge. I'm scared. She is way too happy about messing with my computer and being in charge of my stories. I'm also thinking of changing the day for updates. Does Friday sound better for you guys? Or maybe Saturday? Well Please Review. My editor will read them for me. Thanks! XOXOX


	14. Welcome Home Darcy's

**I would like to thank pain killers and my daughter. She is an outstanding editor. I think. Still kinda hazy. Without her this chapter wouldn't have happened. I hope you all enjoy this one. They made it to Texas! So why Texas? In TX there are vast amounts of land. Here in the South, land is a big deal. The more you have, the better. Communities rely on those ranches for financial stability. Any of this sound a bit like Pemberly? By the way San Antonio is considered a 'Military City'. Remember that for later chapters *wink***

**I own nothing but a smart-ass of a child.**

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**Chapter 14 Welcome Home Darcy's!**

Nevada was one thing, Texas…well Texas is crazy. When their golden boy got hitched, it did not go unnoticed. Now Texas is not NYC or LA, but it does have its own flare. Ever have a mariachi band greet you at the airport. San Antonio baby. A few reporters got shots of William holding Elizabeth tightly to his side as she avoided being seen. Oddly enough Darcy did _not_ freak out. Go figure. He almost seemed used to it.

Liz called her sisters who had scurried off with Fred in another car. "Don't forget my straightening iron and that stuff I put in before. Oh, and my robe and slippers…"

"Damn it woman, I already know all this. Stop avoiding being alone with him. Mary out."

And just like that Mr. and Mrs. Darcy were plunged into echoing silence in the backseat of a black limo. Nice Bing, real nice.

For a second she wondered if she could just pretend her traitorous sister never hung up on her, and just keep talking. She looked up and decided it was unnecessary. Darcy was busy typing away on his phone. "_Hubby,_ are you ignoring your little ball-and-chain?"

"No more than you're avoiding me, _wifey._"

"We should probably talk, uh?"

"Yes, we should."

"…"

"What would you like to address first Bennet?"

"How about your… manner of speaking?"

"We just got married less than twenty-four hours ago. You're moving into a new home. You will soon be on public display. Work may become awkward. We have to tell Giana. We have to send out a press release. My aunt will kill me. Your mother wants you to get pregnant. You may actually be pregnant. The reputation of my life's work is relying on our capability to pass as a couple in love. And you want to discuss how I articulate?"

"You don't stutter around me and you talk like you have a dictionary up your ass."

"…" Will was at a loss. "Well, I… Um, it's just that I…" How the hell can he explain this kind of crazy? He had been working his entire life to get rid of his speech impediment, but when he saw Elizabeth; he had a new determination. It was_ her_ face that he visualized as he practiced every day. It was imaginary conversations with _her_ that he rehearsed. Hours upon hours, he asked Fred and Charlie what was appropriate. He'd ask them to give him examples of how _she_ may respond to certain comments so he wouldn't be caught off guard. Even after he proclaimed her an ice bitch, _it was still her he saw_. He wrote it off as his OCD. Just another habit he couldn't shake. He could tell her the truth. For a moment he considered it. He could travel back and finally have that moment to explain. "I only stutter when I am anxious. You simply don't excite my nerves like that." Genius.

"It seems I was able to _excite_ your _nerves_ last night." Liz didn't understand why his words stung so bad.

"Are you deliberately _trying_ to misunderstand me? It was a compliment. I believe you prefer drama and would rather argue with me than actually have a genuine conversation."

"What the fuck Darcy? You asked me what I wanted to talk about and instead of just conversing, you ran your fucking mouth off. We could have had a nice chat about something _other _than the shit storm that is our marriage, but nooo. God, why would I ever think things could be different between us." Liz stopped her rant. _"Oh shit did I just say that? Don't read into it. Don't read into it. Please don't fucking comment on it. Fucking hell!"_

"What do you _mean_ 'different'? You've thought of…"

_"Fuck my life."_ She cut him off, "Friends Darce. I thought we could maybe work on being friends. That's all." _"Please don't dig deeper. Let it go. Let it go. Just fucking move on you prick."_

"Mhmm. Yes, otherwise it could be a very long year."

_"Thank you Lord!"_

Will didn't understand why her words stung. _"Wouldn't it be for the best if we could get along? Friends. It would certainly be better than the alternative."_ He took a deep breath and found he missed the calming smell of her hair. "Alright Bennet, if you can work on your quick temper,…"

"Then you'll work on getting that dictionary out?"

"Yes."

The newlyweds delved into silence once more. They seemed to come to a silent agreement that it was best to just not speak. It may have been a small agreement, but a victory none the less.

It took almost an hour to make their way to the outskirts of the city and to his ranch. It was already getting dark and exhaustion was creeping up on them. Part of Liz just wanted to isolate herself and sleep. The other part new she needed her stuff, food, and her sisters.

_"Holy shit on a cracker. I LIVE here? Fuck me sideways!" _Even with the limited amount of light, the house was surreal. The sound of the trunk snapped her out of her slack-jawed state of shock.

Charlie cheerfully came out to meet the happy couple. "Welcome home Mr. and Mrs. Darcy." Liz thought she'd pass out. Before she got the chance she noticed Darce breathing shallowly. The doctor in her was able to put her own discomfort aside for the sake of his.

He felt his chest constrict and it became hard to breathe. _"This is really happening. There's nothing left to talk about; it's real. Really fucking real." _ Just when he thought it was about to get worse, he felt a small yet firm hand rub circles between his shoulder blades. Circle, circle, pat pat. Then small hug from his side. Lavender. Her hair sent the smell wafting towards him. He didn't hear her words, though he knew she was speaking. She was able to walk him inside even as he closed his eyes to breathe in the calm.

She sat him down on the nearest sofa. How could she not see this? In all the years she had known him, how could she not see it? She realized right then and there. _"All this time I've claimed to know him, but I never really did. I've never took the time. Not really. I let my own pride and vanity keep me from knowing, and possibly helping this man. I'm such a bitch. No wonder he hates me so much .Fuck...he **hates** me."_

Lizzie got up wanting to find the kitchen to get him some water but he reached out for her hand and pleaded with his eyes for her to stay. _"Not awkward at all." _

As if he read her mind, or had gone through this many times, Charlie suddenly appeared with a few cool bottles of water. "Sorry Elizabeth. I should have known that would freak him out. Well the good news is that it has probably finally hit him. Changes to his reality kinda screw with his head. He needed to have a good freak out. Back in the day when he was _really_ bad, his favorite math teacher quit to teach at another school. He didn't talk for three weeks. He also broke out in hives due to the stress." Charlie lightly laughed as both Liz and Will stared at him with a you-are-a-complete-and-total-ass look. He stopped mid chuckle. "I'll just go and set the oven to warm up dinner."

"Your friend has good intentions…but he has to be aware that that story was ill timed, right?"

"I often wonder if I haven't gotten much better at social skills because of my lack of sufficient role models."

"Darce, did you just make a funny?" He looked confused. "You know make a funny; make a joke."

"Ah, it depends. Did it amuse you?" She gave him the most genuine and inviting smile and he couldn't help but to reciprocate it. "Then yes, I suppose I _made a funny_." He had only seen that smile from afar and directed at other people. Not that he stared or anything creepy and stalkerish. He wanted to be the reason she smiled like that. _"Oh shit. Fucking crap! Not again! Oh good God I can't go through this fuckery again. Please no. I…I'm crushing on Elizabeth Bennet again! Maybe it never ended? Fucking hell, I think I may be in love with my wife."_

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**A note from the editor: Hi. Just so you know, I read all the reviews to my mom. (I'm the one typing for her) She loves them and I wanted to thank all of you who have reviewed and even wished her well. She is, thankfully, on the mend. She hasn't written any new chapters but has several already done that I am helping her edit. If this story gets a lot of reviews I'll post a chapter mid week sometime. Why? She gets so happy with reviews that she will dictate notes about upcoming chapters. I want her be inspired to focus on something other than being bed bound. Plus I saw bribery works on you people. (insert sinister laugh here) **

**By the way Mom says "Thank you for all the reviews. I hope to be up and about soon. I will start posting on Fridays starting next week. Hopefully. XOXO"**


	15. The New Happy Place

Thank you to everyone who reviewed! As a treat here is the next chapter early. For those of you who are confused with the schedule...sorry. The new posting day will be Friday. Why, you ask? Editing sucks and doing it on Saturday sucks worse. So here is chapter 15 as a bonus. Yes there will be one posted on Friday as well. Why, you ask? Because I love my readers!

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**Chapter 15 The New Happy Place**

"Wow…just…wow." Jane.

"I know, right?" Charles.

"You could easily fit eight in there." Fred.

"Early to mid-1700's?" Mary.

"Yes. It was passed down on my father's side, from England." William.

"That is the biggest freakin' bed I have _ever_ seen." An awestruck Lizzie.

After a quiet, but less awkward, dinner, Darcy led a tour of the house. He took them to the gym, indoor pool, five guest rooms, four suites, game room, media room, two living rooms, formal dining room, kitchen, casual dining room, sitting room, a library, two studies, sun room, and music room. Now, all six of them were lined up at the foot of an enormous bed in the ridiculously large master suite.

"What are those three doors for?" Liz couldn't get over the size of the room. It had its own sitting area, computer/work area, terrace, fireplace, and two; yes two TV's. The whole room was airy in soft off white and various shades of tan and brown. She stared at three sets of French doors on the far end of the room.

"Ah, the center leads to the bathroom, the doors to the left are to my closet, and the right will be your closet."

Liz moved to the doors of her new closet with her sisters flanking her. When she opened the double doors, all three of them gasped.

"Heavens." Jane.

"Damn." Mary.

"Fuck." Liz.

"Gentlemen, would you mind grabbing Elizabeth's things and bringing them in here. Take your time, she'll need a moment." As the men left, Mary smirked at her sister, Cinderella, "I hate you a little bit right now." It was a blank canvas. It was huge. It was pristine. It had built-in shoe racks!

Darcy was the first one back with a duffel bag. "There's a secret compartment." He went to a corner and pressed a hidden button. The girls stared at the spot he pushed but then turned to the island in the middle of the room as it made a few clicking sounds. Plain panels unlocked to expose several drawers and little doors. Darcy opened a couple to reveal a few precious rings and necklaces. "I don't have many pieces here, just some of the basic, less valuable ones. The rest are locked up in safe deposit boxes. These were my mother's casual pieces." Darcy spoke slowly. He could almost feel the stutter coming. Why was he nervous?_ "Dear God. Am I nervous because I want to __**impress**__ her?"_

"Wow, Dar…William, these are pretty damn impressive for just being casual." She saw him try to hide his pride and the cutest little grin. She wanted to make him do that cute little grin again. _"Damn, cute? Really, Liz? Okay, keep calm. Be an adult. He can be cute, nothing wrong with thinking he's cute. Nothing wrong with it all. The man is attractive and I'm a red-blooded female. I can admit he's attractive. Don't freak, don't freak."_

Mary made her way to the French doors on the left, "These must lead to the bathroom right?"

"Um yes. I thought it was inefficient to walk back out into bedroom then into the dressing room. Why not just have a door there?"

"You designed this house? I thought you grew up here?" Jane was both impressed yet confused.

"The land has been in my family for generations. I spent my early childhood in another house on the property. I helped my father design and build this house when I was about ten." Darcy tried not to stare at the floor and blush. That didn't really work out for him.

_"Damn the cuteness!"_

The other men finished bringing in Liz's bags in, just in time to witness their reaction when Mary opened the doors to the bathroom.

"Holy shit!" Even Jane cursed.

"Fuck!" Liz's favorite word.

"I think I just came a little." Yeah, that would be Mary.

The girls were too preoccupied to hear the strange grunt/sigh/growl sound that emanated from Fredrick. They didn't even hear when banged his head against the island either. They were too distracted by the oversized Jacuzzi-style tub. It could seat two people facing each other **and** had an extra bench for more room. They stared in awe at the vanity. It was a 'his & hers' with an extra space for the little Mrs. to sit down a fix her hair and make-up. The best feature was the walk-in shower. All three girls stood inside and gawked. Yes it was **that** big, even Darcy and the guys still fit.

"Holy…" Jane.

"Mother of…" Mary.

"Fu-ck!" Guess.

"I totally get Mary's previous statement." Jane visibly shivered. Poor Charles probably should have left that bottle of water behind. At least he managed to keep it in this time. Too bad it went down the wrong pipe and caused him to cough uncontrollably. Everyone just ignored him. He felt the love.

Darcy felt obligated to speak, "I renovated the bathroom a few years back. I went a little OCD here in the shower. There are benches along the walls because it doubles as a steam room." He had pictured someday having steamy shower sex and he didn't want have an accident. Benches would be less dangerous. "Above us is the rain feature." The girls looked up to see several large metal panels that would simulate rain. Darcy had a rain fantasy too, but disliked the idea of having to do such an activity outdoors. "Over there is the waterfall feature." See previous statement. "And of course the typical six head shower system with a handheld as well." Yes, he thought of the handheld shower head as a sexual device too. Sometimes OCD has its perks.

"Everyone out." Liz was calm and sweet, "I must have alone time with my new happy place." When no one walked away she dropped the Jane act, "Alright I need you people to move. Here let me walk you out." Lizzie said her good-byes to her siblings and the guys while she walked and didn't notice Will's absence.

Once outside Jane decided she was gonna go for it, "Mary do you plan to go straight home?" Mary nodded while hugging Liz good-bye. "Charles, I don't want to be a bother, but could you do me a favor?" She gave him her patent-pending doe eyes and a demure smile.

Bingley almost forgot to breathe, "Yes! Uh, sure. Yeah." He sighed, feeling pathetic, "Anything. Anything at all." _"Yeah, that didn't reek of desperation at all."_

_"I will own you, Charles Bingley."_ Jane smiled a little wider, "I know it's late, but would you mind taking me to the grocery store?" Charles was doing his best bobble head imitation. "You see I work tomorrow and would really like to get this over with and sleep-in instead of waking up to an empty kitchen." Charlie didn't even hear the lame attempt to convince him. He was too busy fumbling with his keys and leading her to his car. _"You're mine Charlie."_

_"He never stood a chance." _All three sisters thought at once. Out in Austin, a certain mother grinned and heard the distant ringing of a church bell. In her head.

"I guess you're at the mercy of my sister Mary." Liz smirked at Fredrick, "I _can_ trust you to be a gentleman, right?"

"I wouldn't dream of touching her." That did not come out like he intended. Let's try that again, shall we. "I mean I don't want to." Much better. "You know what I mean." No, no they didn't. Freddie huffed in frustration when he saw confusion sweep across their faces. "Come on let's get you home._"_

Elizabeth sighed to herself. Fredrick was hard to read. It was no wonder that Mary was reluctant to move-in on him. He looked just as happy as Mary did when he was _touching_ her earlier. _"Fucking stupid surgeon."_ At least Jane would get her man. No one really knew it, but Jane had a hidden _Mary_ streak in her. She knew _exactly_ what she was doing. Her sister will have Bing wrapped around her little finger in a week tops.

_"Shower or bath? Bath or shower?"_ Lizzie mused as she made her way back to bathroom nirvana. _"Apparently the bath is taken."_

Darcy was checking the temperature of the sudsy water when Bennet walked in, "I uh, ran you a bath." She just stood and stared at it. He slightly jumped when he remembered to start the jets.

"You ran me a bath?" She didn't know what to think much less say about it. _"How about 'Thank you', duh."_

"I know the last twenty-four hours have been…turbulent. I just figured maybe…um. You know you don't have to, I can just…"

_"He's just so freakin' cute when he's all flustered like that. Wait what did he just say? Oh hell no I want that tub!"_ Darcy was going for the drain switch when she touched his hand to stop him. "Thank you William, it was really thoughtful. It smells divine. What's in it?"

"Rosemary, eucalyptus, sea salt and powdered milk. It helps relax the muscles and moisturize the skin. You know, Nevada desert, airplane…um, grossness." Liz smiled radiantly. Darcy blushed and stared at her lips. "I left you two towels a wash cloth and a robe…right…here." He was looking at her lips so much he didn't notice that she was half-way to naked. He quickly turned away but he couldn't bring himself to walk away.

"Jeez Darce, it's not like you haven't seen it before." He didn't turn around so she figured she'd move in front of him. His eyes almost popped out and she wanted to giggle. "Okay look Darcy, I'm not a nudist or anything, but being a doctor has made me not care about nudity. So you're just gonna have to adjust." At that she dropped her bra to the floor.

Darcy would probably have an issue in his pants if it weren't for the pile of clothing on the floor. He was still staring down at it when he heard her sink into the warm water. "Bennet, I will try to adjust to your nudity if you would be kind enough to consider my issue with clothing." She looked over to watch him pick up her clothes. "Dry cleaned? Delicates? Wash and wear?"

He pushed his glasses further up his nose to read the labels on her underwear. Liz didn't know what was worse, her embarrassment or the fact that he looked so damn smexy as he concentrated on that itty bitty tag. She wanted to drown herself.

He went into her closet to sort her clothing into the correct laundry bins. Yes, he had a separate bin for everything. Liz was relaxing in the tub with her eyes closed. "Ben…um, Elizabeth, would it bother you if I took a shower? There's a wall there so I won't be exposed and…"

"Go for it. I don't mind." Liz was blissed out in the tub and didn't care what he did at the moment. She wasn't aware of time or the world in general in that tub. That was until he walked in from his closet wearing a towel. It was white and barely hanging on. It was about to slip when he caught it just in time. _"Fucking modesty. Wow…I'm a perv."_ She watched his toned abs move as he walk closer to her. The 'V' at his hips made her lips go dry. She wanted to slap the hand that held on to that evil stupid towel.

"Elizabeth? Bennet?" He had been calling her name for a while before she finally snapped out of some kind of daze. _"Well it has been a long day. Poor thing."_ She finally looked up at him and he thought that perhaps the water was too warm for her. She seemed to be a bit flushed. "Can I get you a bit of water or anything else before I take a shower? Is the water too hot?"

"Everything is fine Darce. Go. Enjoy the waterfall. I'm good." She watched as he turned towards the shower. She couldn't help leaning back a bit to get a better view and watched as the evil towel was removed and placed on a hook. "Hello!" She didn't realize that was out loud, but his ass was… "Mm mm mm."

Darcy poked his head around the wall that separated his nudity from her eyes. "Did you say something Elizabeth?"

"Nope. Just talking to myself." She tried to relax but every time she closed her eyes she either saw a flash of her wedding night, that delicious 'V', his ass, or even his glasses. Yes his glasses, don't judge. _"Fuck, fuck, fuckity, fuck, fuck. No, no, no. Not happening. It was just a crush. It's over. It was NOT an obsession. Nope, nah uh. Sure he's not the raging asshole I thought he was, but… Fucking HELL! No, not again. I will be strong. I will not indulge in childish crushes. I will NOT fall for William Darcy. Ever…again."_

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So what do you think? Time is gonna go by a little faster now that they're home. I was wondering if you would like to know what happens to the Jane and Mary when alone with the boys. Some ideas have been outlined but nothing is written out. Let me know in a review or even a PM. In the next couple of chapters we will introduce a few more characters at PemMed. See you all on Friday!


	16. Bennie, Willard, & Laughter in the Dark

It's Friday! Good news everyone. Mom is back to writing! She's doing much better, but is still on bed-rest. Dr.'s orders. (which makes her pouty) So in between games of Candy Crush and Solitaire; or when she isn't reading on FF, she has been writing a little. Good thing too. Aside from this chapter she only had one other prewritten. Thank you all for the support you have shown her. It warms my heart to see her smile at the thought of you guys enjoying her work. So by this time next week she'll be back on track.

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**Chapter 16: Bennie, Willard, and Laughter in the Dark**

_"Elizabeth Bennet is my tub. Elizabeth __**Darcy **__is naked in my tub."_ Will was now experiencing a new kind of misery. Complete and total confusion. It was the most uncomfortable sensation. He'd never experienced so many contradictions all at once. This was his fantasy; and yet his nightmare. He hadn't really forgotten how much of a bitch she was, but she could be so sweet and understanding. So many other women wouldn't have been so understanding of his problems. Her attitude was ugly at times, yet her smile, her laugh, her mind; were all so beautiful to him. She could be so selfish. But over the years of watching her with her family, friends, and clients; he saw how giving she could be. She had him rising in anger and then falling in love. _"Love…"_ Did he really _want_ to go down that road? Is that something that one could willingly avoid or stop?

Silly Darcy.

Darcy had impeccable timing. As he exited the shower he was met with a naked Elizabeth…bending over…in all her nakedness…drying her calves…nude…stroking...rubbing _"FUCK."_

Will gave thanks silently that his robe was thick and puffy enough to hide his sudden erection. For his own sanity, he opened her own robe and helped her put it on. He needed to cover that shit up.

_"Awe, Darcy is so sweet."_ Elizabeth promised herself to be more patient and kind. She was already thinking of several exercises she could try with him. She almost felt a twinge of excitement. She would redeem herself. She would be his friend. She would take care of him. She _wanted _to take care of him. He could hear tires screeching to a stop in her mind, _"Hold up. What?! I __**want**__ to take care of him? Why do I suddenly care? Why do I wanna redeem myself? Why do I care what he thinks?"_

Lizzie excused herself to change for bed. She was about to just dump her bag out when she thought about how it would freak her new husband out. She rummaged through a bag trying to not make a mess before she gave up. "Darce, can I borrow a t-shirt?" He came in a moment later with a PemMed heather-grey tee in his hand. He only wore pajama bottoms. Low-rise. _"Stop staring at…your husband. Okay that sounds fucked up even in __**my**__ head."_

"I hope this is sufficient."

"Darce, just say 'Here you go Liz' no need to be so…proper."

"Ah, yes. Well, here you go…Liz." He handed it to her like she'd take his arm with it.

His trepidation made her a bit more ashamed of herself. "Hey Darce? Do you think that maybe you could help me with sorting out my closet tomorrow? I'd, um, appreciate your…natural ability to organize."

"Please, call me Will. So are you just trying to get me to do your work for you? Or maybe you want to see my OCD in action so you may use it to ridicule me later." He knew he shouldn't have said it the moment it came outta his mouth. He had never witnessed her tease or bully anyone. His past made him jump to accuse.

"They must have been so cruel to you." Lizzie knew about bullies. She was never what her peers would label as normal. The three eldest were always the 'Bennet Freaks' and shunned. She learned that if anyone wanted to be her friend, it came with favors. A term paper here, take home test there, and tons of homework. For someone so intelligent; it took her a long time to learn her lesson. She had thought that Darcy had the world given to him. That he was too good to be bothered with common people. She'd never be able to be good enough for him now.

William was overwhelmed. She saw. She really did understand. _"She must have… Who would ever…? Why? Why would anyone ever hurt her on purpose?" _Their eyes met. A brief flicker of mutual pain and comprehension. "I would love to help you. Shall we retire for the evening?"

She gave him a huge grin. A part of her knew that he needed to learn the art of casual conversation, another part hoped he never lose all of it. "Yes, let's go to bed."

"Do you mind if I take the right side Bennet? I don't mean to be rude…"

"It's all yours Darcy."

They climbed into bed, and yes it was a bit high for the vertically challenged Lizzie. She moan in an ungodly way that almost caused Will to swallow his own tongue. "Dar…Will, you have the most amazing bed." Insert lustful groan here. "I could live on this mattress." Darcy turned off the lamp on his side hoping she wouldn't see the newly pitched tent. "I never want to leave your bed, ever."

"Oh dear God."

"What was that? Did you say something Will?"

Will turned on his side to face her. There was more than enough space between them. "I said this is just as much your bed as it is mine Bennie." He was getting tired and nervous being in the same bed as her. He mixed Bennet and the last part of Lizzie.

"Bennie? Did you just give me a new nickname?"

"I um tend to mix up my words sometimes and I, um I…"

"I like it." She really did. It was sweet. It seemed to symbolize something but she didn't quite know what. "But only you can call me that. It's your special name for me. No one else can use it. Deal?" She didn't know why, but she felt a bit bolder in the darkness.

She had turned off her light and Will felt a bit more brave. "I shall beat any other who dares to use it."

She nearly swooned. Instead she giggled like an idiot. "My hero."

He was glad she couldn't see the goofy grin on his face. He could feel the heat radiate from blushing so much. "Seriously though, I wish for you to make this your home. I want you to be comfortable. This is your bed, your room, your…home. I mean it."

There was something in his voice. A hitch, a tone. _"My home, my husband."_ She felt a pleasant vibration run down her spine. She wanted to say something just as meaningful, just as poignant. "Can I call you Willy?" Epic fail.

"No."

"Fitcy?"

"Hell no."

"Rarcy? No, Darchard? No, Farcy?"

No way. Fuck no. And what the hell?"

"Hey Ricdarcy…"

"Please stop."

"You talk normally in the dark and hung-over. Why Fitzard?"

"Am I a reptile now?"

"Don't dodge the question Willard. Ooh that's a real name!"

He sighed, "You will not call me Willard. Ever. Alcohol tends to make anybody 'loosen up' and the dark is just a buffer. I can relax. I can breathe and stay calm."

"Ah, so the key is to keep you calm? Dill, we are gonna get you outta your shell."

"Don't call me Dill. It reminds me of pickles, which reminds me of my own phallus, which leads me to…"

"Fard! Did you just…?" Liz was gonna swallow her tongue.

"Don't say that either. Sounds too much like hard."

"Filliam! Oh God…" She was laughing so hard her side hurt.

"Do you really want me to comment on anything starting with Fill?" Will could not believe he was saying all these things. Her laughter was addictive. If he could make her laugh, all would be right in his world. He laughed with her and closed his eyes to envision her smiling, laughing face.

Lizzie closed her eyes to the sound of Will's baritone laughter. It gave her goose bumps. Her mind pushed forward images of their wedding night. They were only slightly better than the brief flashes of skin from before. It wasn't long until she heard Will's breathing even out. She laid there awake, staring at the ceiling of her new bedroom. _"Fuck it. I, Elizabitch Darcy hereby pronounce that I am infatuated by my husband. I never got over him, and will admit to having had an obsession with him for a semester or two."_ She remembered her father telling her that lying to yourself was the first step to self-destruction. _"I'm in LOVE with Fitzwilliam Richard Darcy."_ She breathed deeply. She felt lighter. She rolled to her side to look at her husband on the other side of the bed. The vast expanse between them felt ironic. "So now what?"

* * *

I know...I know.

It's usually Darcy that realizes he's in love first. Haha! So now what? She will be going to her sisters for advice of course. The next chapter is being re-edited and adjusted so we can all get the low-down on what went down with our fav Bennet Freaks.


	17. Bonding Over Crunch Berries

**Hello dear readers. I'm back. My wonderful daughter will still be helping me out with editing, but now that I can look at the computer screen without feeling ill, I've started writing again. I want to thank all of you for reading and reviewing. It meant a lot to me. I got so many positive remarks, it warmed my heart. For the ones who weren't so positive all I can say is that this is a COMEDY. Yes the characters are immature and sometimes talk like they're in high school. Guess what? They are fiction. Plus I know (being in my...um let's just say upper 30's) that many adults act more childish than my teenage daughter. Especially when they were denied having a normal childhood in the first place. That being said, lets have another dose of immaturity!**

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**Chapter 17: Bonding Over Crunch Berries**

Darcy woke up and didn't know what to do. He didn't know if he should be around when she woke up or if he should follow his typical morning routine. He hated the uncertainty. _"Any normal person would know what to do."_ He hated how such a simple thing caused so much inner turmoil. He wanted to go the gym room and have his normal workout. The comfort of routine beckoned him. He also wanted to watch her big hazel eyes open after her first night in her new home. Most thought her eyes were just a lighter shade of brown. He knew better. She had two dominant shades of brown mixed with a caramel color and a soft subtle jade at the outer edge. Not that he obsessed over them. It was just a thorough observation he made a few years back. _"She does have a fine set of eyes."_ He stared at her sleeping form. Her hair was a beautiful tangled mess. One leg dangled off the edge of the bed and she had a hand up her shirt just under her breasts. _"Hmm is she cold? Stop staring at her breasts….Stop staring…You will stop staring, now…now...Jesus man, look somewhere else…She does have a fine set of…Workout it is. Decision made."_

Elizabeth woke up to one of her newest favorite sights. Half-naked-dripping-wet-Darcy. "I wasn't sure if I was to wake you or let you sleep in. I just finished my work-out. Fredrick called. He said we're both cleared to be out of work for a week." She smiled and decided that today was about her new closet, her new home, and her new man.

"How long have you been up Willcy?

"Um, about an hour or so I believe."

_"No. No, no. Not Dictionary-Darce again."_ Lizzie got up and stretched. "Do you mind if I use the gym?"

"How soon we forget. Elizabeth, please make yourself at home. I have to go and talk to Mr. Reynolds and his son. They manage the ranch. Mrs. Reynolds will be in soon. She's the housekeeper."

"Richy?"

Will sighed at the name, "Yes?"

"I really do like Bennie. Oh, and your dic…tionary is showing."

She picked up her iPad and walked away before he could comment. She needed to talk to her sisters. Time to eat crow and tell them they were right. Time to pick herself up by the boot, er, bra-straps and figure out what the next step is. She also wanted to know how everything went for them last night.

She walked into the gym and decided on a stationary bike. Liz was happy. She couldn't keep her lips from curving into a faint smile. She just felt lighter, freer, and determined. She didn't know how, but she was gonna get her happily-ever-after, damnit. First things first; call in reinforcements. She called the cavalry on Skype and set her iPad on the bike's bookrest. Mary and Jane picked up almost immediately.

"Well if it isn't the new Mrs. Darcy." Mary wiggled her eyebrows, "Did you two try to recreate your wedding night?" Liz rolled her eyes. "You know you may be able to retrieve those lost memories by doing a little honeymooning." She winked. Fucking winked!

"Don't pay attention to Mary, even though she's right, she's just out of it because of last night."

"Jane I love you…now shut up." Mary's so kind.

"She got nowhere with Fred, but made a new friend…named… Fred." Jane's just confused

"Stop trying to redirect the conversation. Jane made out with Bing and almost made him daft." Yeah, Mary has a way with words.

"Who says 'daft' anymore?" Liz is also confused.

"The conversational elite." Mary grinned, "After Fredrick dropped me off, I encountered a zombified Charles Bingley walking downstairs. His hair was disheveled, his tie was gone, and he had the stupidest grin on his face. It looked like he got laid…"

"I did NOT sleep with him! I swear Mary, for the last time, I did not have sexual relations with that man." Both girls giggled at Jane's attempt to sound like Clinton.

Liz was not about to let this die, "I have monumental news, but I won't utter a word till both of you spill on exactly what happened last night. Jane sounds like she got laid so she can go first."

"What the hell!? I just _told you_, we didn't have sex!"

"Just start from the beginning. Then tell us if he Bing'd your Cherry." Lizzie also has a way with words. Kinda.

Mary snorted and almost tripped on the treadmill. The sisters lived within walking distance of a gym and often worked out together. Jane appeared to be on an elliptical machine.

You do realize that you're disgusting, right?" Liz just giggled a bit as she pushed random buttons on the stationary bike. "It started off a bit slow. If I didn't ask questions or move the conversation along, he would just freeze. We were already on aisle eleven before her started to thaw out."

"Love blooms over Cap'n Crunch." Mary quipped.

"With crunch berries." Jane never should have told Mary.

"I knew you touched his berries!" Jane blushed so hard at Mary's comment, Lizzie thought she might have to adjust her screen.

"Wait! Seriously? Did you bing his berries?" Liz almost choked on air.

"It's not what it sounds like." Snickers taunted her well-being. "Charles was grabbing a few things he need too. You know? He might as well since we were already there and all." Giggles. "We both reached for the crunch berries." All-out laughter. "Grow up you pervs! You know how I love those damn crunch berr…Oh Lord. Just, just shut-up already."

Liz almost fell off her bike from laughing, "So you both reached for the berries? Was he a gentleman and offered you the berries? Or was he a greedy bastard and refused to share his berries with you?"

"For your information ladies, he was very generous with the berries." If you can't beat them… "We bonded over my love of crunch berries." Jane joined in their amusement. "After bonding in the cereal aisle, his conversation skills improved." Jane waited for the laughter to die, "He was a gentleman and helped me bring everything up to my apartment. We made small talk while I put everything away, but he never asked me out or tried to kiss me. I was about to start pulling my hair out! Seriously, how clueless can a man be?"

"Perhaps you were being too subtle?" Mary was fishing for tips on what to do about Fredrick.

"I kept putting items on all the lower shelves so I could show my rear to him. I mean, this gym membership needs to start delivering results. My tush looks good damnit. But now my back hurts from bending over so much. Guys, stop laughing." Jane tried to hide her smile and look serious.

"Poor Jane. Getting bent over the veggies by Cap'n Crunch over and over and…" Liz has a twisted sense of pervy humor.

"Tell her what you did. Liz this is priceless." Mary was too excited.

"You have to understand that I was just so…frustrated. I was at the breaking point." Jane's blush was turning beet red, "I um, pushed him against the door and practically molested him."

"What?! Seriously? Oh my God!" Liz tried to stop pedaling but the machine kept going. She finally just tucked her legs up to her chest and let the demon pedals go.

"He was leaving! His hand was on the doorknob and he said he'd see me at work or at Will's; I snapped! I...I just couldn't let him leave like that. I pushed him against the door and kissed him. He uh, tried to say something, I think, and instead of backing off, I uh stuck my tongue in."

Mary only knew she kissed him and hadn't gotten all the juicy details yet. "Atta girl! The man can't protest if his mouth is otherwise engaged. I'm so proud!"

"Plus he shouldn't talk with his mouth full. It's just rude. So what happened next? Did he kiss you back?" Lizzie continued to do battle with the possessed cycle.

"Well yes, he did start to kiss me back. It was so sweet and gentle. Then I um, lost it."

"As in your virginity?" Mary teased.

"No! No, nothing like that! I just dragged him by his tie to the couch made-out with him." Jane looked like she could be the first person to ever truly die from embarrassment.

"Way to go big sis!" Liz cheered, while punching random buttons on the newly dubbed Psycho Cycle.

"Did I ever tell you, you're my hero? You're everything I wish I could be." Mary started to sing.

"Mary please stop." Jane grinned

"I can fly higher than an eagle." Liz couldn't resist.

"But you were the wind beneath my wings." Both Liz and Mary singed.

"You both totally ruined the best Beth Midler song ever." Mary opened her mouth to continue singing but was interrupted by Jane the snitch. "Mary met the new surgeon at PemMed and he flirted with her!"

"Oh really, do tell little sis." Liz watched Mary grow red and throw an empty water bottle. It landed on the other half of her screen, aka Jane's head. _"I really do love my sisters."_

"I know where you sleep at night _Janie_!"

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So tell me what you think. Jane is a beloved character and I didn't want her to be slutty, but I also wanted to break her out of her usual mold.

Thank you to my daughter. You are awesome!


	18. Mutual Sniffing

**Here is an extra long chapter! Why? Cause I love my readers.**

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**Chapter 18: Mutual Sniffing**

Darcy took a deep breath. That woman confused the crap outta him. What the hell was a head-case supposed to do? Routine. That would clear his head.

He put on an old faded pair of blue jeans, a white undershirt, and a light blue work shirt left unbuttoned. Yes, many cowboys in Texas wore jeans so tight that a girl could decipher whether or not they were circumcised. Not Darcy. He didn't want to become sterile. Yes, many wore cowboy boots made with exotic animal skins like ostrich and various reptiles. Nope, not Darce. He has seen too many slips and preferred a rubber soled and steel toed work boot. Cowboy hat? Nope. Too hard to wash. He has a thing for laundry, and baseball caps could be thrown in the washer without a fuss.

Darcy raised and bred horses. He mostly dealt with rodeo and work horses. He didn't want to step into race horses. Too flashy for him. He loved a simple quiet life. As simple as he could get anyway. He walked out back and breathed in the warm air. So much to do today. _"We might need to have a serious conversation. We need to tell Giana. We probably need to talk. We need to make an official statement for the press. We should talk. We need to fix her closet…Maybe I can just tell her I have work to do on the ranch, no talking necessary." _Will felt a ball of tension…or something, in his stomach. _"We."_ For the first time in his life he was a 'we' an 'us'. His brain could not wrap itself around that concept.

"Will!" He hadn't even heard Tristan approach. "Ah, I see your head is still in Vegas. How's the newlywed? And where _is_ the new Mrs. Darcy?"

_"…Uh…Uh…Uh."_ Yeah. He used to babysit Tristan. He's just a few years older than Giana. He has changed his DIAPERS_. "Uh…"_

"Wow, must have been crazy in Vegas." Will was still trying to form a full sentence in his head. "You know, we all knew that you were with someone. In fact mom has always said that it was impossible for _anyone_ to work _that_ many hours." Darcy's eyebrow nearly hit botox-like height. "And then a few years back you started to go to all those black-tie events. You barely stayed halfway through one event a year, and then boom; you're out every other weekend."

It appears that fooling the staff would not be as difficult as he would have thought. "She's in the gym. I'll go see if she's done. Um, perhaps breakfast in half an hour?"

Tristan knew Will was not a man of many words, but it looked like his new wife turned his brain to saw dust. "Are you sure you wouldn't like some privacy? Dad and I have been holding Ma back since last night."

"Oh, uh."

"Why don't you go ask the Mrs. and report back. You know, you might as well get used to asking for permission first. It will save you many nights off the couch."

Darcy chuckled and nodded, "You, Trist, are wise beyond your years." Will did actually catalogue this sage advice in his head.

He made his way to the gym where he heard Elizabeth laughing. He lingered in the doorway just to hear it a bit longer, then heard singing, laughter, and some sort of threat. He saw Liz laugh on a bike that was running amuck and decided to help.

Lizzie was laughing so hard that she didn't hear him come in. She didn't sense him behind her. She didn't even notice him leaning over to turn off the Psycho Cycle. When she did, things did not go so well. In about two seconds flat, several things happened. First, she turned her head in a manner that positioned her lips to the corner of his mouth. Second, both jumped, yet only one had their feet firmly on the ground. This resulted in a fall that left Liz laying face up on the floor.

"Ow." It was not the most painful fall she ever had. Nor was it the most embarrassing. "Ladies, I will see you after your shifts." She heard snickering. Damn snickering. _"Bitches."_ Liz saw Darcy with a worried expression on his face. Was it wrong to feel warm and fuzzy about it? Maybe. Would it be wrong to milk it for all its worth? Yeah probably. Was she really gonna sink that low. Yes, yes she was.

Will felt sick. _"She detests me so much, an accidental brushing of her lips disgusts her."_ And now she's on the floor in pain and it was all his fault. "Elizabeth, are you alright? Is there anything I can do?" He knelt beside her and didn't quite know what to do with his hands.

"Nothings broken but I think I need help getting up." Liz basked in the attention. She knew she was fine but wanted to be a greedy bitch. Don't judge. Will took her hands to gently help her up. She groaned, "Ooh, dizzy." Hey, no judging!

"Liz did you hit your head? No, no. Let me carry you." Will felt horrible, first he practically throws her down, then he feels giddy for being able to touch her. _"There are just so many things wrong here." _He smelled her hair. _"So wrong."_

Liz wrapped her arms around his neck and tucked her head in his chest so he wouldn't see her Cheshire cat grin. _"He smells good. Real good. He's strong. Real strong."_ All too quickly, they reached _their_ room. He apparently made the bed and tidied up the room. He cautiously laid her down but she didn't let go for a few seconds. _"Just one more sniff. Hm. Maybe I did hit my head."_

Darcy felt strange letting her go. _"Did she just sniff me?"_ That uncomfortable knot in his stomach was back. _"So what _is_ the policy on sniffing? Who do you ask about it? Maybe Jane can give me another lesson or maybe a Q&A session."_ Poor William. He was still confused and seemed to have more and more questions. "Would it be fitting to introduce you to the Reynolds? They, er, live in a small house on the land and work here as well. I, um, suggested meeting over breakfast…but if you would rather n-not…"

Liz heard the nervousness in his voice but his face was once again distant and reserved. Something he has mastered over the many years she realized. She laid a soothing hand on his forearm, "Its fine Darce. But perhaps we should contact you sister first?" How can a man look more at ease and more scared at the same time? "If you don't mind going back to the gym to get my iPad, we can Skype her right now and then have breakfast. Good?"

As he left Liz could not help noticing his casual attire. _"Oh sweet baby Jesus. I am in sooo much trouble."_ Although the cut was relaxed, she could see how the jeans hugged his thighs as he walked. The man looked good in a suit, but damn. Maybe she should just tell him. Maybe she should just rip off the training bra and grow up. _"Hey Hubby guess what? When I was sixteen I was in love with you. I even followed you around sometimes when you didn't know it, just so I could know your schedule and where you lived. I even stole your pen. Yeah that was me."_ Not creepy at all. He would hold it in his mouth when he was busy shuffling papers or books around or in his backpack. Uh huh, that explains it. Yeah…she still has it. She groaned in despair. _"Maybe it's too soon to lay-on the heavy. I mean, I have a year… Did that sound as fucked up as I think it did? I. Am. Chicken shit."_ She groaned again as she rolled over to face plant on the floor. "Ow."

Darcy heard her groan as he walked through the bedroom door, _"Maybe I should take her to get her head checked."_ Yeah, if he only knew what was beneath the surface he'd probably swing by the psych department. He heard a thump and took off to her side, "Bennie! Are you okay? What happened? Should I get you to Pem? Lizzie!?"

Liz knew she was alright. Maybe a bruise or two but she'd be perfectly fine. But she decided to stay on the floor for a second or two longer. Greedy bitch. Yup, she was basking in Will's concern and the fact that her ran to her and called her Bennie. Spine tingle, thigh quiver. _"He's touching me! Holy Fuck. When did I become a teenage Fan-Girl?"_ She needed to regroup. "I'm fine Will. Don't worry." _"Please keep touching me."_

"Are you absolutely certain? It would be no inconvenience to simply drive to work." _"Stay calm. She says she's alright." _Hair sniff.

"I fell because I was too close to the edge. I'm truly fine." _"No! Don't let go!"_ "But perhaps you can help me back into bed?" _"Damn, he smells good."_

"Of course." He heard her sniff him. _"I wonder if she is aware of any sniffing etiquette?"_

"Come on Hubby." He quirked an eyebrow. "Take off your shoes, come snuggle next to me, and we will call your sister; together."

Will toed off his work boots and lined them up just right next to bed yet out of the way as to not cause a tripping hazard. He now had a wife to keep safe. _"My wife."_ Plus you know what they say about accidents in the home. He stood there for a few seconds. He needed to be on her right. Yeah, it's one of his things.

Now that Lizzie has decided to pay attention to her husband; she easily read his mild distress. "You don't need to walk all the way around. There's more than enough room to crawl around me so you can be on the right." She saw his shoulders relax. Well as relaxed as Darcy can be with the lights on. She tried not to blush as he crawled over her feet. Fail. She quietly wished the bed was not so long and forced him to crawl over her body. All over her body. All over. As it was, she felt almost grateful for the foot action. The bed was so long and wide, he could have avoided touching her completely. _ "Heehee. Long and wide. Haha, foot action. Isn't that a fetish? I'm perving over my husband. I'm such a horn-dog."_ She snuggled against him and, well, sniffed him. _"Another happy place!"_

Darcy was too busy contemplating the rules of sniffing to realize Liz was practically throwing herself all over him. All over. Absolutely clueless. Blame the sniffing conundrum. Yeah, he found it hard to** not** fixate on things that puzzled or confused him. He just couldn't let go until he found answers to the problem. That was one of the major reasons why he was so successful. Everyone thought, because of his severe expression, that he contemplated the major things in life. World peace. Over population. The recession. They never realized he often contemplated things like how much dip is appropriate to put on your plate. If you wear silver cufflinks, what color watch is acceptable? Should it match your belt and tie pin? Yeah, the inner working of a business super genius. Go figure, right?

"Snuggle Bunny, time to focus." There he goes with the eyebrow. Liz saw he wanted to say something about the nick names. Ha! She'd push him until he was forced to respond. She'd get that dictionary out; even if it was one page at a time damn it! "Okay, you ready? Here we go."

They were both ready for a long and challenging conversation with Georgiana. What happened took them by surprise. Actually it almost put them clinically in shock.

"What the hell are you two doing?"

"Giana, I can…" Will didn't get another word in after that. His baby sister scared him.

"First of all, you two are on your honeymoon. You should be making like rabbits. Second, it's about time you two got your shit together. I so freakin' called it. Oh, by the way, Aunt Catherine is totally pissed. She's gonna meet a lawyer to question him about annulment laws in Texas. Alright, I'm not gonna come back for another week to give you guys some privacy. Get back to the baby-making. Laterz." And she was gone. And the happy couple were left in utter shock.

Darcy just realized Bennet was snuggled half-way over his body. _"She has her leg draped over my waist...HOLY SHIT!"_

* * *

Do you hate me for the cliff? Do you hate me for skipping Mary's night?

To prevent any hate here is what's coming up:

Darcy has a panic attack and actually passes out.

Liz gets to touch...er help him.

We learn about Mary's night.

New Doctor. HeeHee!


	19. Guarding Against High Blood Pressure

**This one is a little late, but it is technically still Friday here in Texas. This chapter is dedicated to those who have been here since the beginning, especially ConstanceBoniful. I hope I didn't keep you up too late.**

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**Chapter 19**

Lizzie straddled her husband and checked his pulse, breathing, and pupils. "Damnit Darce!" Right after Giana signed off he started to hyperventilate. Now he was out cold. She wasn't really too worried, he would wake up soon enough. _"Hmm, I should take off this shirt. Wouldn't want Hubby's breathing to be restricted. Just to be safe I'll get rid of the undershirt too."_ Can't be too careful when it comes to one's health after all. She struggled for a moment or two but she was willing to suffer for his benefit. She is, after all, trying to be a devoted wife. _"Tight clothing can affect a person's blood pressure. These jeans could be considered a bit snug."_ No they wouldn't. _"Is this wrong? Am I molesting my husband? Not if I don't get caught."_

In the end her conscience won out. She decided not to remove his jeans. Instead she just unbuttoned and unzipped them. And smiled. A lot. Her face hurt from it. He wore Marvin the Martian cartoon boxers. Giggle._ "Just a peek."_ She slowly and gently lifted the elastic band of his boxers. _"Hello there. Oh. My. God. He MANSCAPES!" _ She did a bit of a fan girl squeal in her head. She figured that this would be the moment that he woke to catch her in the act. She wasn't sure if she was disappointed or not when he didn't. She reluctantly removed herself from his lap to run to the kitchen.

She was just closing the fridge holding a bottle of water and a sports drink for electrolytes; when she saw an incredibly astonishing sight. A grey haired, jean and polo shirt sporting, orthopedic shoe wearing, woman was riding up to the house on a Segway. Lizzie was about to make a run for it but got caught.

"Oh, Mrs. Darcy! Finally we meet. I'm Mrs. Reynolds. Oh dear aren't you the most gorgeous thing!" Elizabeth was only able to nod, inch away slightly, and open her mouth to talk only to be cut off. Another inch. "Giana and Fitzwilliam talk constantly about you." One more inch. "I was beginning to think you were a figment of their imagination." Inch away and nod. Mrs. R followed, "I knew he was head over heels for someone. He is such a brat for not telling me!" Smile and nod. Inch, inch. "But of course I had a feeling it was you. He always got this look in his eyes whenever Giana brought you up." Liz couldn't help but blush at that one. Inch. The hallway back to their room was so close, and yet so, so far away. "Oh dear, no need to be embarrassed. People fall for co-workers all the time. Why I remember when I first met Mr. Reynolds…"

Okay that was her limit, "I am so sorry to interrupt Mrs. Reynolds but my husband is passed out in bed at the moment." Mrs. R grinned like a crazed grandmother mooning over the thought of more grandbabies. "Oooh, no. I-I mean he's really out cold." More grinning. "N-no, no, I mean like hyperventilated and fainted. I should be there when he comes out of it."

"Oh no! Heavens!"

_"Finally the proper response."_

"We should go check on him."

"Yeah, I was getting him something for when he wakes." They rushed down the hall and Liz just remembered something. _"Oh shit! Half-nakedness! Fuck." _ For an older woman she could really move. Before Liz could prevent it, Mrs. R was already through the door. Displaying that crazy baby-making grin again. _"I just got busted perving on my husband."_ Lizzie grabbed her phone and snapped a picture of Will. _"I'm going to hell anyway, why not make it worth it." _Yeah she snapped two more while Mrs. R. giggled. "What? He's cute!" Damn the evil grandma grin. "Don't judge Mrs. Reynolds, don't judge."

"I'm not judging at all. In fact why don't you crawl in next to him and I'll take a picture of both of you." Liz moved to lie next to him. "No, no. The other side. Just crawl over him. I doubt he'll mind."

Liz was mid straddle when she heard a picture snap. She was still on Will's lap when she grinned at the feisty old broad. "Oh, you're a sneaky one aren't you?"

She giggled at the newlyweds and took another picture. "Maybe you should do up his pants before we take another. Liz nodded and started to zip him up. Two more pictures were taken. Feisty. "Oh heavens, the look on your face!"

Lizzie couldn't help laughing along with her. That was until William woke to find Liz straddling him and trying to manipulate his jeans.

Will did not quite understand how he found himself in this situation. He was partially nude, Liz was straddling his lap with her hands on his zipper, Mrs. Reynolds was there as well. She was apparently taking pictures. Then everything went black…again.

Mrs. Reynolds just laughed as Lizzie stared down at her husband who had forgotten to breathe and passed out…again. "I'll leave you to it. Have fun sweet girl. We'll see you two tomorrow."

Before the old woman was half-way through the large room Will woke up. Liz was still on top of him. "Don't pass out Sugar Plum. Breathe."

Will tried not to not to think about the fact that a stunning woman was sitting on him. He took a few deep breaths and tried to stare at the ceiling. If it was dark or maybe if he had a few drinks in him, he'd have said or maybe even done something daring. Maybe he'd ask her if she enjoyed the view. Or tease her about wanting to get him naked. Maybe he'd even buck his hips up and tell her that all she had to do was ask. He may have even sat up and just kissed her. Alas it was a bright shining morning and he was completely sober. _"This must be how that guy on Big Bang feels."_ He instead asked a question that has been driving him to madness, "What's the policy on sniffing?"

"Sniffing? Really? You wake to my imitation of a cowgirl pretending you're a horse with your housekeeper taking incriminating photos, and this is the question you ask me?"

"You sniff me…often. And your hair smells like lavender and makes me feel calm."

_"I'm so busted." _Liz felt embarrassed, therefore she dodged the question, "Would you like a whiff? Would that help?" She didn't get off of him. She simply laid down on top of him. Her shortness put her hair right under his nose. Her nose was tickled by the small patch of hair on his chest. He inhaled deeply. She had a passing thought of licking him. Yes, we have already established that she has a bit of a perverted mind. _"Is it weird that I find his nipples cute?"_ Let's not go there.

"So could we elaborate on the sniffing issue? I'm at a bit of a loss." If Darcy hadn't been so confused he would have had a totally different issue to worry about…in his Marvin the Martian boxers.

"Well when we are alone we can sniff as much and be as obvious and loud as we want. In public it may be a bit inappropriate. So stealth and subtleness would be wise. We can practice if you want. Maybe we can come up with a few signals for when you need me. You know, for when we get separated in public." Lizzie made a mental note to not let themselves get parted. It wasn't so much for his anxiety but hers. She's seen the way women look at him. She can admit to herself now that she watched those vipers try to get their hands on her man. _"I'm not afraid to let the bitch in me out. Caroline might have to get her nose redone…again, if she even comes close to my Hubby!"_ Her hand actually twitched in anticipation of slapping the fake off her.

With his conflict resolved, Will's body registered that there was indeed a woman clinging to his body. Lavender did not have a calming effect on a certain piece of his anatomy. "Elizabeth?"

"Bennie. You can call me Bennie, Cuddle Monkey." She could almost feel his bitch brow.

"Uh, Bennie, why am I half n-naked with my p-pants undone?" Will really wished he could come up with the courage to say what he really wanted. _"Hey Bennie, why are you__** not**__ half naked with me?" _or _"Why am I only __**half**__ naked?" _He started to seriously contemplate having those black-out things installed on the windows. He stopped pondering the subject when he felt himself start to harden. _"Damn her hotness! Get off me! No, stay! Um, half off, half on. Fuck. My. Life." _

Lizzie decided to go with the truth, "I just wanted to take advantage of your unconscious state and see you naked. I only _got_ halfway."

The thought that Elizabeth wanted to see him naked was ridiculous, and she was obviously only teasing him. He laughed as he easily removed her tiny frame off his body before it embarrassed him. "Now do be serious." He chuckled. Fucking chuckled.

He listened to the medical bull that she had told herself and he accepted it better than the truth. Liz was not a happy camper. She'll be the first to admit that her pride tends to get her in trouble. This, however, is about guarding her heart. She was too scared to just put her heart out there for him to burn and reject. She needed him to want her. Need her. Love her. She was gonna have to find a way somehow. By the current look of things; this was gonna be harder than she thought.

She figured changing the subject would preoccupy him enough to keep his clothes off. "So how did Freddie get me the whole week off? Ooh, did he say anything about last night?"

Will wondered which relationship was granted more loyalty. Elizabeth was his wife. Their marriage was only a few flashes of memory and a rather disturbingly sexual dream. His cousin has been his best friend and confidant since birth. The man has seen him at his worst. He owed him so much more than he could ever pay back. He would hate for the sister of his crush to know his secrets, "Fredrick is in love with your sister Mary and is currently jealous of the new doctor, Frederick Wentworth, of whom they met up with last night." Wife trumps lifelong friend slash cousin. He may be socially awkward…but he ain't stupid.

"I knew it! That spastic idiot!"

"What the hell is a spastic idiot?"

"He needs to fucking man up."

"Seriously, is it an idiot who is spastic?"

"I'm gonna hurt him."

"Or is it someone who has spasms and happens to be an idiot?"

"Hmm? Oh, it is an otherwise smart person that suffers from occasional spasms of pure idiocy."

"Wow that actually makes a lot of sense. And it describes him perfectly."

"Tell me everything about last night." _"While I ogle your chest."_

"Um, okay. Well as you know Fredrick was a colonel in the army. He met Captain Wentworth, who was in the navy while in Iraq. Now that Wentworth has retired, Fred has asked him to work at Pemberly Medical."

"They're both Fred."

"Fred_er_ick will be going by Erick. As I was saying, Wentworth came into town and needed a ride from the airport. Thinking nothing of it he called Freddie. The three of them went out for coffee and Erick and Mary got along…quite well. Turns out he is staying in a hotel near you and your sisters. They plan to carpool. My cousin is less than pleased."

"Oh really?"

"Yes well it seems that they managed to have conversed more in that one night than all his attempts over the last few years. Freddie seems to think that Erick was flirting."

"Holy shit! I need to talk to my sister." Liz was gonna get to the bottom of this. Even if it killed Fred.

"Um, Bennie? I probably shouldn't have told you that." Fred was gonna kill him.

"Why did you then?" Liz was gonna kill Fred.

"I have been told that it was always best to make sure your wife is happy; you know take the side of the woman that controls where you sleep at night."

"Darcy, you may just be the wisest man of my acquaintance."

Will blushed and gave her that shy grin that makes her ovaries tingle. _"Damn the smexy gets me every freakin time."_

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_Reviews make me Happy._


	20. Pancake Tacos

Hello. Did you miss me? Well I missed you. Yes, I was a bit under the weather. Yes, I'm doing better. Bad news...Last week was my daughter's last week of school and she is now spending half her summer with her dad. So now I'm missing an editor. But that's okay. Why, you ask? Smut/Lemons/the reason for 'M' rating is coming up. Not so much in this chapter...but soon.

Disclaimer: Let us all remember the master, Miss Austen.

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**Chapter 20: Pancake Tacos**

Liz and Darcy continued to talk about random things in bed for a while. For Darce, it was just to give his blood time to recirculate. Not an easy feat, when Liz seemed to inch closer and closer. There was also the unfortunate problem of her breast being pressed together in a rather distracting way. Poor Mr. Darcy.

They eventually went separate ways. Liz took what she called an 'out body shower experience'; while Will made incredibly large hoagies for lunch. Having skipped breakfast; he thought she would need a sandwich that could feed three people.

Liz joined him at the island in the kitchen to eat. She nearly fell from the stool she saw what she was expected to eat. She cut it in half and looked up at Darce only to almost fall again. He had squished his sandwich too hard and was currently licking mustard off his hands. Licking. She thought she might pass out as a flash of him licking her body on their wedding night popped into her mind. _"Damn freakin' hot as hell flashbacks."_ Elizabeth wondered if William ever had flashes of memory. She decided that she could be an adult and just ask. She also decided that revenge was almost as yummy as chocolate. It took a few tries but she was finally able to squeeze out mustard in a particular way. "Oh damn, that tastes so good." Yeah, she said it in _that_ voice. "And I love this mustard." She then sucked on to fingers. Yes, exactly _that_ way. Lizzie saw the contents of Will's sandwich fall out from between the bread as his eyes glazed over. Yup, he has flashes. Yes revenge is delicious. _"Two birds. One stone."_ She saw that half of the contents of his meal landed in his lap. "Oh! Let me help!"

"Oh d-dear God!" It took two pickles and a tomato before Will registered Lizzie's hands in his lap.

"I got it, I got it." Liz couldn't wipe the smile off her face when she noticed he was getting really hard, really fast. _"Baggy jeans won't hide __**that**__!"_

Will froze like a: Deer in headlights. Dumb blonde in horror film. Bennet sister getting _the talk_ from their _dad_.

He snapped out of it suddenly and excused himself to change his attire and quickly ran out the kitchen.

She knew she had taken it a step too far. But it was difficult for Liz to be married to this man and not be able to do naughty things to him. Sure maybe someone from the outside looking in would wonder at her hating him yesterday and loving him the next. But it was all just fucked up. She loved him since she was sixteen. She never stopped, she knew that now. _"Hindsight is really just Karma bitch-slapping you."_ At the time, she thought she had never been in love. She may have been intelligent, but what did someone so young really know about love and rejection. That's what she had felt, rejection. It has been said time after time, that it's so much easier to hate someone rather than to love them. That's what Liz had done; she'd taken the easy way. She didn't want the easy way anymore. _"If the line between love and hate is so thin; why does it hurt so much to cross it?"_

Darcy changed into a clean pair of jeans. He leaned against his dresser and sighed. Things simply didn't add up in his head. He knew for a fact that Elizabeth did not want to be married to him. He knew that she didn't love or even like him. He also knew that she wanted to be friends and nothing more. _"Then why did she act so peculiar?"_ Darcy wasn't exactly clueless when it came to flirting. Women have been coming on to him for quite some time. He's never flirted back mind you; but he knew what it was. He's even kept track of his progress. He can now figure it out 87% of the time. Yes, he even has a chart on his laptop. _"But, there is that 13%. I could be wrong."_ Poor Will. First the sniffing situation, now this. His world has gone completely crazy. Then an equally crazy thought occurred to him. _"Friends with benefits? No, no, no."_ It wasn't the thought of sleeping with her that freaked him out. It was the thought of sex, with _her_, without affection. Sex without meaning, with _her_. Even if it wasn't a deep devoted love, it should at least be between two people that don't hate each other. Then, like all men of the over-thinking persuasion; his mind turned in another direction. _"Women often tie sex to emotion."_ This was true; he read a study about it. _"If we were to engage in casual intercourse; it could bring out hidden emotions in her. It could help me show her how I am starting to feel and perhaps help her come to her own romantic conclusion. Having sex with my wife could save my marriage!"_ Novel thought Darce, ingenious really._ "Wait, I want to stay married? I want to stay married. I want to stay married to my wife!" _Although Liz was a bit ahead of him; for Will, this was progress.

His epiphany was interrupted by a very concerned Liz. She never meant to embarrass or confuse him. She promised herself to tone it down and not let her hormones take over her better judgment. "You know, getting an erection when a female touches you is totally normal." Good job in making him less embarrassed. "It's flattering really. I mean that, it isn't something you should get embarrassed by or feel ashamed of." She actually thought he should be proud. She was definitely impressed with what she saw…felt…remembered vaguely.

Darcy gave his shy thanks for her understanding. But it didn't seem to reach her. She had a small smile on her lips while she stared off and leaned against the door frame. He slowly waked towards her gently calling her name. She was just so beautiful in his eyes. So soft and petite. Her eyes. He was always entranced by her gorgeous eyes. Before either of them realized it, his face was inches away from hers. Just a bit more and they would be in kissing range. One more inch…just one more.

It has been mentioned that Mrs. Bennet has horrible timing.

Elizabeth hit her head as her phone blasted the 'Wicked Witch' theme song from _The Wizard of Oz._ "Mom?"

Mrs. Bennet has always been loud. Mary thought it had to do with an underlying need to be heard. After living with a husband that ignores her 75% of the time may have contributed to this issue. In other words; Darcy could hear every word she said even without the speakerphone turned on. "Oh Lizzie, have you seen the news! Everyone has been calling to ask me for the details!"

"Mom! You better not…"

"Oh stop I haven't said a word. Don't be so theatrical! I don't understand how I could have raised such a melodramatic child!"

"Seriously?"

"I just wanted you to know that I'm planning the barbeque for this weekend and that you and your husband are the guests of honor! Oh I'm so excited! I've invited the Lucas', the Knightly's, oh and the Price's…"

"Mom! No! Too soon, and too many people! And you should have only invited _family_! Not everyone in freakin' Texas!"

"Well I can't invite some people and then not invite certain others! They would be offended! I'm always trying to think of other people's feelings above my own, you know that!"

"No. That is final. I will be calling Mary and Dad. If you don't tone it down, we simply won't come that's it." Liz hung up on a very irate Mrs. Bennet. She walked towards the bed and jumped as high as she could to belly flop onto it with a frustrated groan.

Darcy stared at her ass. It was firm with a bubble and slightly jiggled. OCD doesn't change the 'Y' chromosome.

Darcy walked around to the other side of the bed and did his own belly flop. Lizzie lifted her head to look up at the top of his head. _"No balding or thinning. Good to know. I'm so random."_

Feeling her stare Will looked up too. Not much more than a foot separated them. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"For taking the embarrassment out of the earlier situation. And for standing up to your mother. I don't know if I could handle being the center of so much attention. At most large social functions, I can try to blend in or stay in the background. I don't know how I would have made it through something like what your mother had planned."

Liz was determined to make life easier for her husband. _"Maybe, if I do a good job, he'll keep me."_ She laughed internally at her own joke. With renewed determination she rolled over and dialed her dad's number. As she waited she scooted up and turned her head to face Will and put her phone on speaker.

"Ah, Lizzie. I consider myself to be quite special to receive a call during your honeymoon my dear." He sounded a bit jovial to Will.

"Oh Dad, of course your special."

"I'll admit I was taken by surprise Lizzie dear." Will pondered his teasing tone.

"Dad."

"Are you happy?"

"Yes." She said without hesitation.

"Is he a good man?"

"The best I've ever known. That is, aside from you of course." If you closed your eyes, you could hear the smile in her voice.

"Then that is all I need to know."

"Daddy…?"

"I know that tone. What do you need child?"

"Dad, Mom is completely out of hand. I'm telling you right now, I won't let Mom parade my husband around like a show pony. Dad…" She looked at Will asking for permission. Oddly enough he nodded. She hid her giddiness knowing that they were able to communicate without words. "…Will has a tiny case of social anxiety. He may come off rude but really he's just shy. Please don't expect me to feed him to the sharks."

"Ah, I see now. Never fear my girl; I will keep the sharks at bay. It will be extremely amusing to witness, I imagine." His mirth was contagious.

"I'll talk to Mary too."

"Thank you my dear. It will be nice to have back–up. Well I'll leave you to your husband."

"Love you Dad. Thanks." Elizabeth smiled at her husband.

Will returned her smile and sighed, "Let's go fix your closet."

The rest of the day was spent sorting clothes and shoes. They didn't talk about anything deeper than work, family, and friends. They agreed to go to her apartment to retrieve the rest of her things. They decided to host her family at the ranch so that they could avoid a surprise attack from her mother. They would adjust their schedules to allow them to carpool whenever possible. Liz wanted to 'out' Freddie to Mary. Will wanted to lock them in a room with copious amounts of alcohol. Well, apparently it does get results.

The day flew by. Elizabeth decided to make pancakes with sausage and scrambled eggs. They were joined by her sisters. Will looked a little scared of Mary.

"Okay Mare, spill." Liz said as she threatened her with a spatula.

"There's nothing to spill. While Freddie was driving me home he got a call from Erick; an old friend of his. It turns out that he's an old military friend of his and will be working at Pemberly with all of us. Anyway, he had just arrived on a late flight and we picked him up. We went out for coffee and had a pleasant evening. That's all."

Jane giggled. "They plan to carpool."

"Yeah well I trapped you into that too sister dear." She stuck her tongue out at Jane. Mature. "Besides, I plan to set him up with Lizzie's PT."

"Anne Elliot?"

"Yeah, I think he's her Ricky."

"No!" Both Bennet sisters gasped and drew Darcy's attention.

"Yes." Darcy looked back at Mary hoping for clarity.

"No!" Darcy never cared for tennis, but he looked like a spectator.

Darcy wondered if he was intruding, "Should I leave…"

"What makes you think it's him?" Lizzie was leery.

"He was in the Navy. He looks just like her description. She always said 'Ricky' was a nickname. When I suggested he use it instead of Erick he got this pained look in his eyes and said he preferred Erick."

"Ahhhh."

"Seriously, I could just go…" Poor Mr. Darcy.

"Did he do that nervous thing?" Liz started to plate the food.

"What nervous thing?"

"I could eat in the other room." Darcy wondered if he could get away with just grabbing his food and running. He was about to get up from his seat.

"Don't be silly Honey Bee." Liz pushed him back down as she put a plate in front of him. "Anne said he grabs or rubs his ear when he gets nervous."

"Oh, like how Charlie rubs the back of his neck. So cute." Jane sighed and got googoo-eyed. She's bordering on nauseating.

"Yeah, he so did that."

Darcy tried to concentrate on making a taco out of his pancake, sausage, and eggs. "I can arrange for his office to be on the Junk Floor." The Junk Floor was actually four consecutive floors for displaced doctors. The cardiology department, aka the eleventh and twelfth floors; didn't have an extra office for Jane so she went to the twentieth. Her sisters all joined her.

"That would be an abuse of power." Will looked up from his taco at Mary. "I think it's brilliant"

No one looked at him oddly or judged him as he drizzled maple syrup on his pancake taco. He started to feel…accepted.

"I don't think we should jump in on it. He hurt her so bad when he left." Lizzie really cared for Anne. She started as her physical therapist but she was so bright Liz pushed her back to school to be a physician's assistant. "She's been through so much already. How do we know we can trust him with her? And when did you become cupid incarnate?"

"Look, he's tall, blonde, handsome, funny, and a total sweetheart. Erick is one of the good guys. I just _know_ that if you met him you'd like him too. Seriously, if you would have seen in him what I saw last night; you'd all know what I mean and give your consent."

Freddie leaned against the wall. He had just walked into earshot to hear his Mary sing the praises of his friend. She must have really been taken with him. He felt his heart tear, slowly. What should he do? Stand aside and let his friend have the woman of his dreams? Fight for her? _"Would he even appreciate her? What if he wasn't over that girl, Annie? He was always mooning over her. What if he couldn't give her all his love? She deserves to be loved completely. She needs to be first. Not someone's bandage to stop the bleeding from an old wound."_ Yes, Freddie was capable of thoughts deeper than chocolate syrup and handlebars. _"Would he be able to make her happy? Do I love her enough to let her go? Yes. But I'm a bit too selfish to do it. You're going down Erick! She's MINE!"_

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I am not ashamed to admit it...I have eaten a pancake taco.

Coming up next: Wickham!


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